Joke I made up: Caveman and a bear walk into a bar. Bartender says "what's your story?" Caveman says...
Bear with me...
Why didn’t the caveman cross the road?
Because he was dead before roads were invented.
Why was the 18 year old caveman so troubled?
He was having a midlife crisis.
what do you call a catboy caveman?
Back in caveman days, all we had were clubs and rocks. And doors hadn't even been invented yet...
...we had to tell each other "thump thump" jokes!
A caveman saw a pterodactyl for the first time.
Caveman : Look at that dino soar!
Caveman discovers weed
Caveman discovers fire
Stone age begins
What is Caveman's favourite font?
The doctor was teaching a caveman about human anatomy
Doctor: Do you know where the lungs are?
Caveman: I know this by heart
Caveman Shark Tank
Guy who invented the wheel - alright this is gonna seem a little unorthodox, but just roll with it
Caveman sharks - do what with it
G - oh you'll see
2 girls and their dad are sitting in a car.
Girl 1: Dad, why am I named Rose?
Dad: Because a rose fell on your nose as we were leaving the hospital.
Girl 2: **caveman noises**
Dad: Be quiet, Brick.
I once saw a caveman wandering aimlessly in a roundabout manner.
I think it was a meanderthal.
What do you call a caveman who doesn't really know where he's going?
It's amazing how far humans have come since the caveman days
when people used to communicate by writing on walls....oh wait, we still do.
This guy at work thought it would be funny to call me a caveman
I told him that was pretty low-brow humor
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
What did the caveman say when he stumbled upon a pooping dinosaur?
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
What did the caveman say when he tried to have sex in his dark cave?
I fucking rock.
Every family reunion we would see our uncle who we called “caveman” we called him that because he was big and hairy and every now and then he would eat one of us
Then we found out he was a bear
I (maybe?) came up with this joke today. What do you call a lost caveman?
What is a caveman's favourite thing to do on a Friday night?
Once upon a time, there were two cavemen...
There were two cavemen overlooking the tundra.
Caveman 1: Hey look! A flock of elephants!
Caveman 2: Herd?
Caveman 1: Herd of what?
Caveman 2: HERD of elephants.
Caveman 1: 'course I have! There's a flock of them, right over there!
What do you call a caveman who likes to walk slowly all the time.
What is a caveman's favourite audio compression algorithm?
While Fred the caveman was just relaxing after a tedious hunt, his wife came running to him, all in tears. "Fred, come quick, a sabre-toothed tiger just entered my mothers cave!" Quite calm, Fred took another sip from his beer and said "So what? Who the hell cares what happens to a sabre-toothed ...
"We need to talk..."
Thought the caveman...
A time machine goes to the hospital.
The doctor enters and goes to 2017. He finds a caveman inside and returns to the present day.
The doctor says, "Sorry sir, but you have an ana-chronic disease."
Misc religion based puns
What do you call a horse who doesn't believe in God? Hay-thiest
What do you call a pig who believes in the old gods? A pag-ham.
What do you call a practitioner of Hinduism who solely worships in the morning? A Hin-dew.
What do you call a caveman unsure it he believes in...
I asked the caveman if he wanted to play poker
"Deal, me in!"
A caveman walks into an auditorium
He sits down in the front row and a janitor walks by. The janitor turns to the caveman and says, "Hey, the anthropology lecture doesn't start for another hour. You're early, man."
Properly relocating a cavewoman
Q: Why did the caveman drag his cavewoman around by the hair? A: Because if he dragged her around by the feet she would fill up with dirt.
The Better Paleo Diet
I’m on the Paleo diet, except I’m the caveman who discovered Snickers.