UPJOKE
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If the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags," and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs," then...

what does that make the Tennessee Titans?

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Buccaneers Anthrax Scare

Tampa Bay, Florida, Sept. 26, 2014.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers football practice was delayed nearly two hours today after a player found a mysterious white powdery substance on the practice field.

Coach Lovie Smith immediately suspended practice and called in local authorities.

Fore...

Where does a pirate keep his buccaneers?

Under his bucking hat.


Sorry if this has been posted recently! You know pirate jokes. You hear one, you’ve heard them arrrrrrrr

Where does a pirate keep his buccaneers?

Under his buckin hat!

The Buccaneers Didn't Win the Super Bowl... Yet

In fact, it might take weeks until we know the final score, as soon as they finish counting all the mail-in points.

How much does it cost for a pirate to get their ears pierced?

A buccaneer

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With all the recent name controversies, Tampa Bay Buccaneers will be renamed the Tampa Bay Tampons.

They are not the best team, but they are up there.

Hey do you know where I can find some buccaneers?

Yes on either side of your buccan head.

I went to a fancy dress party dressed as a Pirate, the host said where are your buccaneers? I replied.

Under me buckinghat.

What did the pirate say to the captain when the captain said “Aarrgghh where be my buccaneers?”?

“They’re on your buccanhead cap’n!”

How much do pirates pay for corn?

A buccaneer.



Nah, just kidding... they just steal it.

Someone should keep the ball safe so the Buccaneers don't get a Deflategate.

Nobody better Tampa with it.

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So this kid dressed like a pirate goes Trick Or Treating...

A lady answers the door and says "My! What a big buccaneer!" He replies "Oh yeah! Well you gotta big fuckin' head lady!"

Trick or Treat!

A small boy dressed as a pirate knocked on my door last night.

I opened the door and he waved his sword & said "Trick or Treat"

I said " Oh look a pirate, but where are your buccaneers ? "

He took the chocolate bar & replied " Under my buckin hat "

More NFL news

NFL CUTS ONE TEAM

The NFL announced today that for financial reasons they had to eliminate one team from the league.

They've decided to combine the Green Bay Packers and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and form one team, causing many layoffs but saving millions of dollars in costs.

The...

How much a pirate charge for piercings?

A buccaneer.

(Although if you ask me, that's two deer)

"I say Long John Silver, I really like your earrings, how much were they?"

"2 dollars"
"They're not bad at all for a buccaneer".

Down at the farmers market and a man dress as a pirate was selling corn for 1$

It was a buccaneer

What did Black Beard's Otolaryngologist charge for his services?

A Buccaneer!

I've decided to start a buisness selling hearing aids to pirates

I'm going to charge a buccaneer

What did the kid ask the Pirate?

Kid asks, "Where are your buccaneers?" Pirate replies, "They're under my Buccan Hat!"

There's always a queue for piercings at Pirate Bill's tattoo parlour. Great value.

He's a buccaneer

Little Johnny goes trick-or-treating by himself dressed as a pirate...

One of the many houses he visits, was an elderly lady in town. He rings the door bell and the lady opens the door.

Johnny: Trick or treat!

Lady: Ohhhh your a cute little pirate! But, where’s your buccaneers?

Johnny: *Sighs and points to his ears* They’re right here! Where’s you...

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A new Swabbie joins a Pirate's crew.

A new Swabbie joins a Pirate's crew. He goes to the Captain's quarters and meets the Pirate Captain. He's a grizzled man with a peg leg, a hook hand, and an eye patch.

Swabbie: Ahoy Captain, it's looks like you've had quite the history.

Cpt: Aye, I've been sailing these seven seas sinc...

Why did the Chief go out and buy all the corn he could find?

Because he couldn't beat a Buccaneer.

A pirate captain says to his first mate...

“Where are my buccaneers?”

“Aye Cap’n, they’re on the sides of your buccan’ head!”

Halloween Joke

A little boy with a speach impediment went out trick or treating, and about half way through the night, he came upon an old lady's house.
Boy: Twick err Tweet
Old lady: Oh Goodness, a Pirate!! But, where are your buccaneers?
Boy: with a really confused look, points to his ears and says "ri...

Little Timmy came to school dressed as a pirate...

Little Timmy came to school dressed as a pirate, when the teacher noticed this she asked him, “Timmy, you’re a pirate? Where do you keep your buccaneers?” Timmy promptly replied, “I keep them in my buccan-hat!”

Little Johnny goes trick-or-treating...

Little Johnny goes trick-or-treating dressed as a pirate. He rings the doorbell of the first house and an old lady answers the door, bowl of candy in hand.

She takes one look at him and exclaims, "Oh, such a handsome pirate. And where are your Buccaneers?"

Little Johnny looks up at he...

Why do pirates only eat corn on special occasions?

Arrrrr, cause' they cost a buccaneer

A Halloween joke for you

Little Johnny is out trick or treating on Halloween dressed as a pirate. He walked up to a house and said "trick or treat". The little old lady just gushed over his costume. She says to Johnny, "What a cute costume, but let me ask you....Where are your buccaneers?" Little Johnny says back, "They're ...

A little boy is dressed as a pirate captain for Halloween.

He knocks on the door of a house and a lady answers.

She says "Well, well little boy, what are you supposed to be?"

He says "I am a pirate captain".

She says "Well--where are your buccaneers?"

He says "Right here under my bucken hat."

It's Halloween and a little boy dressed as a pirate goes up to the door and yells "Trick or treat!"

The man opens the door, and upon seeing the little boy says "Hey matey! Where's your buccaneers?"

The little boy says "Under my bunkin' hat!"

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Another Football joke

A man-a staunch Tampa Bay Buccaneers fan- goes to a sports bar in Tampa to watch his favorite team play, and brings his dog with him. As usual, the Bucs get slaughtered, while the other team racks up score after score. Finally , late in the game, the Bucs score a field goal. The dog jumps so high it...

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One day, an excited young boy is visiting the docks when he meets an ACTUAL pirate!

This pirate is the real deal: parrot on the shoulder, peg leg, eyepatch, hook hand, sword on the hip. You could not imagine a more stereotypical looking pirate.

The boy runs up to him, squealing with delight. “Oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh! You’re a real pirate!”

“Aye, laddie,” the ...

A little girl knocks on my door and said Brick or Breat. I said what are you dressed up as? She said a Birate.

A birate you mean a pirate She said ya a birate. I asked if you are a pirate were are your buccaneers you know your band of cut throat's and theaves, were are your buccaneers? she said under my bucking hat give me the bucking candy

Little Johnny is trick or treating

and he’s dressed like a pirate! His outfit is top to bottom swashbuckling fun, and he’s incredibly proud of all the fine details included.

He goes to the first house, knocks on the door and when the door opens he yells “twick o tweat!”
The woman at the door fawns over him, she coos “oh...

On Halloween, a little boy dressed as a pirate.

He went up to a house and rang the doorbell. A man answered and said, "Well I'll be, a pirate! But where are your buccaneers?
The little boy replied, "Under my buckin' hat."

I'm writing a story about a Pirate who sells corn...

It's about a buccaneer.

So a pirate wants to get his ears pierced...

He goes to the mall where he finds an ear piercing kiosk and asks the girl how much it would cost. The girl turns and says, "Oh hi! It's a buccaneer!"

How do you hold a pirate rabbit?

With its buccaneers!



Source: Dad.

Pirate for Halloween

A little boy with a speech impediment dressed as pirate for Halloween. He knocked on the door and when the lady answered he said "pick or peat". The lady asked what? He replied "pick or peat" and shook is bag. The lady said oh trick or treat and the little boy shook his head yes.

The lady th...

On Halloween night, a kid knocks on this man’s door. As the man opens the door...

Kid: Bick ‘r beat!

Man: I’m sorry, what was that?

Kid: Bick ‘r beat!

Man: Oh, you mean ‘trick or treat’?

Kid: Yeah! Bick ‘r beat!

Man: Ok, so what are you supposed to be, young man?

Kid: I’m a birate!

Man: Could you say that again?

Kid: A birat...

Why can't pirates wear sunglasses?

Because they have no buccaneers!

Happy speak like a pirate day!

Little Johnny goes Trick or Treating as a pirate...

... When he gets to the house of a kind old woman, she says "Oh don't you look fierce! But tell me, where are your buccaneers?"

Johnny replies "Under my bucking hat, where else would they be?!?"

A pirate's walking down the beach....

...when he comes across a little girl. The litter girl says, "Hey Pirate! Where's your buccaneers??" The pirate responds, "tucked inside my buck'n hat!!"

A little boy with a speech impediment goes trick or treating as a pirate...

He gets to the first house and an old lady answers the door. She says,

"Well aren't you cute. Who are you dressed as?"

He replies,

"I'm a birate! I got my barrot, my bword and my batch!" , pointing to the stuffed parrot on his shoulder, waving his sword and pointing to his eye...

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A Peg-Legged, Hook-Handed, One-Eyed Pirate...

After thirteen months of sailing the seven seas, a battle-worn schooner filled to the brim with booty and booze makes port in the rag-tag pirate isle of Tortuga.

The captain - a buccaneer known the world over for his utter lack of mercy, his terrible greed, and his hearty girth - lumbers off ...

A child is trick or treating...

A child is trick or treating on Halloween all alone. He goes up to a house and a nice man asks him where his buccaneers are. The child says " on the sides of by buccanhead!"

Yet *another* pirate joke

A young boy dressed as a pirate for Halloween and was happily trick-or-treating when he came upon this one house. He rang the bell and an older woman opened the door.

"Oh my," she said. "What a fearsome pirate. But tell me, please, where are your buccaneers?"

The little boy sighed and ...

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It was a fine day out on the sea...

when a young sailer prepared to set sail on his first voyage. Before he boarded the vessel, he came across an old pirate sitting drunkenly on the docks.

"Hey, old-timer," he began, "you look like you've seen your fair share of sea. Could you spare some advise for a young sailer?"

"Gar...

A couple is on their honeymoon in the Caribbean, and they go into a shop so the husband can get his ear pierced.

They walk up to the counter, and the husband says, "I'd like to get my ear pierced to celebrate our honeymoon! How much will that cost?"

The shopkeeper replies, "It'll be $20, plus the cost of the earring you get. If that works for you, you can go pick out the earring while I set up to pierce...

Captain Flint and his crew of cutlass wielding marauders, set sail for Clew Bay, ready to take down the Filthy Five Hundred and collect upon their bounty.

Retrieving the heads of these skallywags will net him $1 per ear, and Captain Flint was ready to lay down his life for it. With $1000 he could buy an entire fleet with 50 men per ship. He'd be the most feared Pirate in the Atlantic!

After 2 days of fighting by sea and shore, Captain Flint an...

The tale of Thanksgiving.

It's that time of year, so raise a cheer, here's to drinking beer and shooting deer. Here's to friends who are sincere and friends who will endear. When others appear we give them a leer, but not so severe that they leave out of fear. We send pioneers to explore the frontier, and they return bearing...

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In honor of Talk Like a Pirate Day

Here's my favorite pirate joke:

When I was 17, I went on a class trip to a beach but I snuck away to explore on my own. I went into this bar. It had nautical stuff on the wall, a bunch of shark jaws, but also streamers and balloons about the place. It looked like there was a party going on. ...

Two Filipino kids go trick or treating on Halloween...

...At the first house they go up to, a lady answers the door.

She says, "oh how cute are you two? Let me guess what you are..."

To the first kid she says, "With your tiara and wand, you must be a princess?"

the first kid says, "Yes! I am a princess!"

The lady says to the ...

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