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Sadder Jokes

What is even sadder than a funeral?

An eral. It is like a funeral but with no fun.

It’s Sadder in Italy

“Doctore, all five of my bambinos! They have the no ambition! They all want to be valets when they grows up, jus’ like their lazy father! Can you do anything?”
…
…
“I’m afraid it is hopeless, Senora Abatangelo. It is the worst case of parking son’s disease I have ever seen.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A depressed man walks into a bar.

He approaches the bartender and says, "I'll have six double brandy." The bartender replies, "You must've had a really tough day!"

"Yeah, I found out that my dad is gay", the man replies.

The following day, the man returns to the bar looking much sadder than before, ordering another six...

What's a sadder place than Crimea?

Crimea river

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Some Sundays can be sad but the day before is always a sadder day.

Saturday!

A lot of people don't like Mondays

But 48 hours ago was a sadder day.

The only thing sadder than a gluten free funeral...

is a flourless grave.

They say Sunday is the saddest day of the week

But experts recognize that the day before it is truly the sadder day.

Happy stories from a remote village

A journalist goes to a poor remote village for a documentary.

He saw an old man and asked him to narrate a typical happy story of his village.

The old man smiled and began:
"One day, a long time ago, my goat got lost in the mountains. As is our tradition, all the men of the village...

I thought Friday was a sad day...

Turns out the next day was a sadder day.

What do you call a sad dog ?

A Melan-Collie.

What do you call a sadder dog ?

A Chi-Waah-Waah.

If you think Friday is a sad day, I’ve got some bad news for you.

Tomorrow is Sadder Day.

A young couple in poverty give birth to identical twins.

After much consideration they decide that the best thing for the baby boys would be to give them up for adoption so that they can have a better shot in life. One boy goes to a Spanish family who name him Juan, the second goes to an Indian family who name him Amal.

18 years pass when the birth...

Sunday was kinda sad

but day before sunday was a sadder-day...

I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet.

Then I was even sadder, because that lucky guy didn't even *need* shoes!

(not original, but I forget the source)

I think we should swap the weekend days

Cause Sundays are definitely sadder days.

A lot of times I'm depressed throughout the week, and then the weekend comes and I'm worse...

Some would call it a sadder day.

There once was a girl named Ann Heuser

Who claimed no man could surprise her.

Till Pabst took a chance,

Found a Schlitz in her pants,

And now she is sadder Budweiser.

I always cry on the first day of the weekend

It's a sadder-day

RIP Bill Paxton

Since Trump took over I get sadder with each Bill that's passed.

I'm 100 percent against

animal cruelty. Nothing makes me sadder than when my dog makes fun of me.

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Big Chief problems

A proud Indian chief walks in the doctors office with his wife.
She says ‘big chief, no fart!’
The doctor understands the problem immediately and prescribes a laxative and to return in 3 days.
3 days later, the chief and his wife walk back in, the chief looking visibly uncomfortable,
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two cops meet at their usual bus stop on the way to work.

Cop # 1 : Hey, what's wrongs? You look really sad today!

Cop # 2: Listen, I've been married to the same women for over 20 years and our sex life just isn't what it used to be. It's become routine and we lost that passion we once had.

Cop # 1: I've been there, and I've found somethi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A reporter goes into a village...

... for a newspaper interview. Once there, he asks around and the people direct him toward an elderly that was laying in front of his house who supposedly had been through many experiences. The journalist then meet the old man and ask him to tell him a story that he would publish in the next newspap...

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