UPJOKE
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Why are the pyramids in Egypt?

Because they are too big to transport to British museums

Why are there pyramids in Egypt?

They were too heavy to steal and put in a British museum.

Why did the Ancient Egyptians build Great Pyramids?

Because their Great Igloos melted.

What did the professor say when his student asked if pyramids were essentially squares?

Yes, but only up to a point.

Why did the Egyptians build the pyramids?

To get to the other side.

How were the pyramids built?

Using a pyramid scheme

Dad jokes rule, peace out.

Why do pyramids have horns?

So you can tootandcomein.

Why do we call the aliens creating the pyramids a conspiracy theory?

It's obviously a pyramid scheme.

Archeaologists in Egypt have found a mummy in a tomb in the pyramids made of chocolates and hazelnuts

His name: Pharaoh rocher

Pyramids were not the tallest structures in Egypt...

They were just medium height, between the Pyrahighs, and Pyralows.

What's an ancient pyramids builders favourite band?

The rolling stones

They say it's a mystery how the pyramids were built

But it seems obvious to me - they probably started at the bottom and worked their way up.

The pyramids took so long to build because creepers kept on destroying them...

That's why the ancient Egyptians worshipped cats to scare the creepers away.

I just found out that Archeologist were recently digging in the Pyramids of Egypt and found a mummy covered in chocolate and nuts.

Experts on site identified the mummy as Pharaoh Roche.

My trip to the Egyptian Pyramids was great!

I saw mummies of cats, dogs, and even donkeys! But I will not talk about the elephant in the tomb.

TIL Ancient Egyptian pyramids didn't have doorbells, they had horns instead.

You just used to toot and come in.

About 3.000 years ago, lived the Egyptians. In their time, they build the pyramids.

As it should be...
I think, if you're going to build pyramids.
You should do it in your own time.





(Sorry if my English isn't that great, I translated it from my language.)

A tour guide at Giza was explaining how the Pyramids were 10,002 years old.

Someone in the crowd asked, "That's oddly specific, are you sure of that date."

"Well, yes, quite sure, I was told they were 10,000 years old when I started working here 2 years ago."

An ancient aquatic system older than the pyramids has been revealed by the Australian bushfires

Australian scientists are thinking about naming them 'rivers.'

Have you guys heard about the drastic effects of erosion on the Great Pyramids?

Yeah, they're kinda pointless now.

Why is it hard to read the hieroglyphs inside the pyramids?

They are encrypted.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A fisherman catches a golden fish

A fisherman catches a golden fish, and when he was about to put the fish into the net, the fish speaks to him:
- I will fulfill a single wish of yours so please let me go.
- Interesting, let me think a bit.

After few minutes of silence the fisherman continues:
- My country is poor an...

I went to egypt for a week

the giza pyramids are quite majestic

but those camel riders are pretty scammy, they would charge you 5 times more money if they recognize you're a tourist

they're running some kind of scheme

*a pyramid scheme*

I got a new dog... His name is Egypt

because he keeps leaving little pyramids around the house.

4 things that can be seen from space

1. The Eiffel Tower
2. Mount Everest
3. Pyramids of Giza
4. President Volodymyr Zelenskyy's massive balls

Who lives in Egypt?

Mommy



\*Credit: my 5 yr old after learning about pyramids at school\*

Cleaning up the heavens

God finally gets around to clean up the heavens and finds the commandments. What to do with the old junk? He looks down onto the earth, maybe someone could have a use for them.

He asks the Egyptians. The Pharaoh looks up and says "Dude, sorry, we're busy with our pyramids, no can do."

...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Chickens are Illuminati

As of 2011 there is an estimated 19 billion chickens in the world or 3 for every person. What has 3 sides? A triangle. Where can you see triangles? The pyramids. Where are the pyramids? Egypt. What did Egyptians worship? Cats and dogs. Cats and dogs are rivals such as chickens and turkeys. When do p...

Mike Tyson in Egypt

So mike Tyson is vacation in Egypt. He is having a great time but slowly begins to run out of things to do. A few days go by and he even grows tired of gawking at the pyramids. He’s searching for something to do! He heads to his local marketplace. There he finds a book on ancient Egyptian hieroglyph...

Archaeologists have been searching around ..

Archaeologists have been searching around The Great Pyramids, and have come across a mummy covered in hazelnuts and chocolate. After more research it has been discovered it was the late Pharaoh Roche

A man and his wife are touring Egypt.

While looking at the pyramids, a local merchant calls them over. He offers the man 100 camels in exchange for his wife. The man takes a few minutes, but ultimately refuses the offer and the two go on their way. A bit later the man's wife asks him, "What took you so long to say no?". The man replies,...

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