My trip to the Egyptian Pyramids was great!

I saw mummies of cats, dogs, and even donkeys! But I will not talk about the elephant in the tomb.

What did the professor say when his student asked if pyramids were essentially squares?

Yes, but only up to a point.

Why did the Ancient Egyptians build Great Pyramids?

Because their Great Igloos melted.

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A tomb raider goes into a pyramid

She enters the pyramid after hearing that the pharaoh holds a great artifact. She hops and dodges all kinds of traps until she gets caught by a zombie slave.

Slave says: I'm going to make you a slave.

He forces the raider into the slave room where he jumps on her in sexual intent. She ...

Why do pyramids have horns?

So you can tootandcomein.

Pyramids were not the tallest structures in Egypt...

They were just medium height, between the Pyrahighs, and Pyralows.

What's an ancient pyramids builders favourite band?

The rolling stones

An ancient aquatic system older than the pyramids has been revealed by the Australian bushfires

Australian scientists are thinking about naming them 'rivers.'

The pyramids took so long to build because creepers kept on destroying them...

That's why the ancient Egyptians worshipped cats to scare the creepers away.

They say it's a mystery how the pyramids were built

But it seems obvious to me - they probably started at the bottom and worked their way up.

I just found out that Archeologist were recently digging in the Pyramids of Egypt and found a mummy covered in chocolate and nuts.

Experts on site identified the mummy as Pharaoh Roche.

TIL Ancient Egyptian pyramids didn't have doorbells, they had horns instead.

You just used to toot and come in.

Why is it hard to read the hieroglyphs inside the pyramids?

They are encrypted.

About 3.000 years ago, lived the Egyptians. In their time, they build the pyramids.

As it should be...
I think, if you're going to build pyramids.
You should do it in your own time.





(Sorry if my English isn't that great, I translated it from my language.)

A tour guide at Giza was explaining how the Pyramids were 10,002 years old.

Someone in the crowd asked, "That's oddly specific, are you sure of that date."

"Well, yes, quite sure, I was told they were 10,000 years old when I started working here 2 years ago."

Have you guys heard about the drastic effects of erosion on the Great Pyramids?

Yeah, they're kinda pointless now.

Mike Tyson in Egypt

So mike Tyson is vacation in Egypt. He is having a great time but slowly begins to run out of things to do. A few days go by and he even grows tired of gawking at the pyramids. He’s searching for something to do! He heads to his local marketplace. There he finds a book on ancient Egyptian hieroglyph...

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A scientist, mathematician, and logician are in a car.

A scientist, mathematician, and logician are in the car. They crash and die. The three men appear in heaven on front of St. Peter and Satan. "Gentlemen," Satan began, "Now that Heaven is overcrowded, St. Peter has allowed to limit the amount of people entering. You may ask me a question; if I answer...

Who lives in Egypt?

Mommy



\*Credit: my 5 yr old after learning about pyramids at school\*

Archaeologists have been searching around ..

Archaeologists have been searching around The Great Pyramids, and have come across a mummy covered in hazelnuts and chocolate. After more research it has been discovered it was the late Pharaoh Roche

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Chickens are Illuminati

As of 2011 there is an estimated 19 billion chickens in the world or 3 for every person. What has 3 sides? A triangle. Where can you see triangles? The pyramids. Where are the pyramids? Egypt. What did Egyptians worship? Cats and dogs. Cats and dogs are rivals such as chickens and turkeys. When do p...

A man and his wife are touring Egypt.

While looking at the pyramids, a local merchant calls them over. He offers the man 100 camels in exchange for his wife. The man takes a few minutes, but ultimately refuses the offer and the two go on their way. A bit later the man's wife asks him, "What took you so long to say no?". The man replies,...

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