Peaceful Place

Picture yourself near a stream. Birds are softly chirping in the crisp, cool mountain air. Nothing can bother you here. No one knows this secret place. You are in total seclusion from that place called "the world." The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenit...

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What do you call horny waterfalls?

Viagra Falls

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A Kung Fu student asks his teacher, "Master, why does my ability not improve? I'm always defeated." And the master, pensive and forever patient, answers…

"My dear pupil, have you seen the gulls flying by the setting sun and their wings seeming like flames?"

"Yes, my master, I have."

"And a waterfall, spilling mightly over the stones without taking anything out of its proper place?"

"Yes, my master, I have witnessed it."

...

What's the opposite of a waterfall?

A firefly.

What happens when water trips over?

Waterfall

I saw a waterfall that emptied into a well

Wat-er-well

How many software developers does it take to change a light bulb?

This question reveals that you are still thinking waterfall. For a more agile approach, ask e.g. "When will the scrum master call the janitor?"

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Trump, Saudi King & Putin find a Lamp on a golf course.

During a world leaders meeting President Trump, The Saudi King and Vladimir Putin take time out to go for a stroll to examine the resorts golf course and settle their differences.

Whilst over the green on the 1st hole President Trump and Putin get into a heated argument. The Saudi King takes ...

Wait...

Fireflies are just the opposite of Waterfalls

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A Priest and a Deacon

A Priest realized that less and less people were showing up to church every day. He goes to the Deacon and asks "How can I get more people to come to church?"

"Well", says the Deacon, "people like food. Maybe if you offer free food at mass, more people will show up."

So the Priest set...

I drove past a billboard promoting Niagara Falls as the tallest waterfall in the world...

Turns out it was falls advertising.

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Two guys camping in the woods (nsfw)

Two guys have been out camping in the bush for so long they're getting sick of each other. So, they decide to split up for a day, one goes north and one goes south, and they meet back at camp the next morning with a little less hate toward each other. North guy asks South guy what he saw-
...

I just heard a joke about waterfalls

It was a pour joke

How to get there faster

The couple was 85 years old, and had been married for sixty years Though not young, they were both in very good health, largely due to the wife's insistence on healthy foods and exercise for the last decade.

One day, their good health didn't help when they went on a rare vacation and their pl...

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Who's up for an owl joke?

So a man is sitting on a bench in the middle of the night making waterfalls with his eyes. A girl he'd been in love with had just broken up with him, claiming she'd found her true love in bird watching. He cried out her name in anguish into the nightsky.


"Who?" An owl. How cruel fate wa...

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Fattest Pig Contest

One day 3 farmers are coming back from town when they see a sign for the County Fair coming next month, right below the main advert is another for a Fattest Pig Contest. The farmers have pigs on their farm so they think they should enter.

When they get back to the farm the first farmer goes ...

Ole and Sven go to Hell (long)

One day, Satan was walking through Hell, making sure the souls were properly tormented, until he came upon an unusual sight. Sitting next to a lava pool were Ole and Sven, decked out in parkas, hats, boots and gloves.

Confused, Satan walks up to them and asks them why they're dressed for win...

Who is Jason Waterfalls?

And why don't they want him to go?

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Two guys are on a camping trip...

and are at each others throats. Seeing as they've been best friends for years, they know how to handle the situation. Both agree to sleep on it, part ways in the morning and meet for dinner after blowing off some steam.

So later that night, they tell each other about their respective days. "M...

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