I actually overdosed on anxiety pills a few minutes ago

I’m not too worried about it

Why did the drug addict suffer an overdose of cocaine?

Because he crossed the line...

A man died due to overdose of green peas

May his soul rest in peas

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One day I overdosed on viagra

Hardest day of my life

I was so sad when I heard Whitney Houston overdosed on cocaine


Did you hear about the guy that overdosed on his homeopathy pills?

He forgot to take them.

What is the antidote they use for an overdose of Ritalin called?


Thanks, I'll show myself out...

My son, who's into astronomy, asked me how stars die.

"Usually an overdose, son." I told him.

A stoner died from a heroin overdose last night.

The paramedics did everything they could but it was all in vein.

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Did you hear about the guy that overdosed on Viagra?

They still haven't been able to close his casket!

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Sad news: Bruce Willis died from Viagra overdose

At least he Died Hard.

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I was fucking worried when my son overdosed on cocaine.

But thankfully he hadn't used any of my stuff.

I put my body to the test and accidentally overdosed on hallucinogenics.

Sure, I died, but I passed with flying colors!

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There was an old man named Mr. Habit who died of a viagra overdose.

I guess old Habits die hard.

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Mr. Johnson overdosed on Viagra and passed away.

His wife took it really hard.

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If you die from an overdose of viagra

Do you die Hard ?

I got a call from the doctor saying my buddy nearly overdosed on his homeopathic medicine.

Turns out he had forgotten to take it.

*Alternate punchline:* His family and several witnesses later disputed this, arguing the actual problem was him nearly drowning.

If a rich man dies from a drug overdose, the headline should read "Pills bury dough boy"

Credit to my friend Chris

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Bruce Willis passes away from a Viagra overdose on 4/20/2069

He picked a good day to die hard

Recently a man died of an overdose of homeopathic medicine...

...he forgot to take his pill.

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I tried to overdose Viagra.

But apparently whatever doesn't kill you only makes you harder.

What’s the difference between a heroin overdose and a shotgun suicide?

Heroin addicts feel great after they shoot themselves.

My son, while gazing up at the sky, asked me how stars die

"Usually an overdose", I said

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Last week I thought I took a fatal overdose of Viagra

But don't worry, I'm okay now.

But my wife -- she took it pretty hard.

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My grandfather overdosed on Viagra the other day.

My grandma took it pretty hard that night; the next morning and all day long!

If you overdose on drugs you don’t go to Heaven or Hell...

You go to Percatory

My Grandmother died of an Ecstasy overdose.

She must be rolling in her grave.

I just found out that the mascot for a famous brand of baked goods overdosed on opiates.

Pills bury doughboy.

I lost my good mate Gav yesterday due to an overdose of heartburn tablets

I can't believe gavisgon.

How did the bodybuilding dinosaur die?

Asteroid overdose!
(a steroid overdose)

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Why did the Chinese Mayor overdose on Viagra?

Because he wanted to win the erection.

I walked up to a girl and said, "If you were a drug, I would overdose!"

She said, "Thanks."

I said, "Then you wouldn't be able to ruin my life any more."

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I accidentally overdosed on Viagra...

... and discovered a completely new way to pick my nose.

What do you call marijuana overdose?

Blunt-force trauma

Mike Tyson recently recovered from a meth overdose and was interviewed upon his exit from the hospital.

When asked about the full story, he responded with,

"I was really methed up at the time"

I keep keep seeing all these pictures from Demi Lovato’s overdose

And here I thought it was just a “before makeup” picture

What do you call a father that overdosed on ecstasy?

Dad with an E.

Where do you take someone who overdoses on homeopathic medicine?

A mental hospital

My grandmother died recently

She was found keeled over in her kitchen, her dentures stained with foods high in antioxidants.

The doctors said it was a heart attack but I know better...

I reckon it was an oxi-dental overdose.

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Did you hear about the guy who died of a viagra overdose?

Terrible news. Really shocking.

Apparently, his girlfriend took it very hard.

My mate Gav overdosed on heart burn tablets

I cant believe Gav is gone.

What is it called when someone overdoses on ecstasy?


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Welcome to hell!

One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair he has his first meeting with the devil.

Devil: Why so glum, chum?

Guy: What do you think? I'm in hell.

Devil: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. You a drinkin' ma...

Last night my friend Gavin overdosed on heart burn medicine......

I can't believe Gaviscon.

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A man dies and goes to Hell.

Satan greets him.

Hey. How's it going?

Not good. I just found out I'm in hell.

I know we have a bad reputation but it's not that bad. It's actually quite fun down here. Did you ever drink when you were alive?

Of course.

Well, Mondays, you can drink as much as you ...

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2020 one-ish liners

2020 so far:
-Welp, I guess somebody finally fracked their way through the wrong Native burial site.

-You think 7 years bad luck for breaking a mirror is bad? You should see what happens when you let polar ice caps melt.

-Nobody’s trying to keep the Jews as slaves again are they? ‘...

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A man gets hit by a bus, dies and goes to Hell..

Upon his arrival, he is greeted by Satan's secretary who begins to process his paperwork and give him the run down on what it's like for eternity.

Secretary: "Hell really isn't all that bad, buddy. We have themed daily activities to keep our residents occupied. Were you by any chance a drinke...

My friend used to obsessed over Jeanne D'Arc, Tomoe Gozen and the Goddess Athena

It's a shame he died of a Heroine overdose.

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3 surgeons walk into a pub...

...The first claims to be the best surgeon of Texas: "the world's best piano player lost 7 fingers in an accident. I sewed them back on and yesterday, he played a private concert for the queen of England."

The second one answeres: "That's nothing. A young man lost both arms and both legs in a...

I know there are about to be a lot of jokes about Mac Miller but please, keep the quantity down

I'd hate to overdose on them

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