Occupational Jokes - 6 Hilarious Occupational Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Occupational Reaction

A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question.
The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the sidewalk, and stopped scant inches from a shop window.
For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, "Look here, don’t...

I feel bad for my neighbor the lawyer. She seems to be suffering from occupational burnout.

These days she just goes through the motions.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man comes home to his wife from his job at a relish factory one day...

He has a confused, lost look on his face, so his wife asks what's wrong.

The man turns to her and says, "I've been having the strangest urge at work lately."

His wife, being the caring woman she is, asks "What is it."

The man sighs and says, "I keep wanting to put my dick in the...

I called my boss and told him I have occupational myopia.

I don't see myself coming in to work today.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I told my boss

That I wasn’t coming into the office today because I’ve got a bad flare up of occupational rectal cataracts.

She asked “What the hell is that? Does it hurt?”

I said “Not really, I just can’t see my ass coming in tomorrow!”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Navy decides its time to help its enlisted transition to careers after their experience serving.

They decided to put an Occupational Counselor on every ship, including submarines. The Hephaestus was one of the best submarines in the fleet and their Occupational Counselor was no exception. He was incredible. There was no resume he couldn’t perfect. No college and company he didn’t have contacts ...

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