Dental Jokes

Dad asked if it was at two:thirty

I had forgotten my dentist had retired last year so I was a little surprised to see a new dentist waiting for me who, come to find out, had just graduated from dental school in russia. After exchanging greetings I sat down and he began his exam. As he was working I casually looked over at his wall d... read more

She had the whitest teeth I’ve ever come across.

The interviewer inquires, “Well, what would you say to a package of five weeks vacation, fourteen paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every two years? Say, a red Corvette?” The engineer sits up straight and says, “Wow!! ... read more

The dentist is flossing his teeth.

Dentist: "So, when's the last time you flossed your teeth?"

Dude: "Bro!!! You don't remember?!"

"You were there!"

until it slipped out in conversation.

At the dentist's office for oral surgery, I was handed a couple of forms to fill out. As I signed the first one, I joked with the receptionist, "Does this say that even if you pull my head completely off, I can't sue you?"

"No, that's the next sheet. This one says you still have to pay us."

A plaque was put up in her honour, but it kept getting removed.

Because there are no dental records and all the DNA matches.

Because they wanna see what that mouth do

We'll call the show "Top Gum"

Turns out he was lying through his teeth.

I eat a full box of oreos in the waiting room before having her clean my teeth.

He said he's going to put me under and I'll feel a small prick in my mouth.

This experience left a bad taste in my mouth.

A man returned for the third time to the dentist to get his dental appliance replaced due to corrosion.

The dentist asked if he ate a highly acid diet, or was fond of citrus, etc.

The man replied that his wife made an excellent holllandaise sauce that was so good he put it on just abou... read more

Tooth pics

All their employees are way too afraid to open their mouths

just last night I heard her using an electric toothbrush for what seemed like an hour

and he says to the dentist, "I think I'm a moth."

The dentist says "Well you should see a psychiatrist!"

The man replies "I already am."

So the dentist asks, "Well what are you doing here then?"

The man says "your light was on."

Man on island, has bad tooth. Needs tooth removed. Friend with an axe is like, I know what to do mate. Uses axe to try to remove tooth but unintentionally knocks out all his teeth. First guy is like, Ouch-aroo mate, that is a 10/10 on the pain scale. Axe guy says, 'Hey man, it was Axe-y Dental'

Tartar Binks

...she would always take her electric toothbrush to bed and brush her teeth all night!

A baseball bat.

Three, but that's only because you're not flossing enough.

I got tired of smelling my own breath through this damn MASK!

It was acci*dental*.

After the appointment the doctor comes out to greet the man.

The man says "how was it?"

The doctor replies "Your wife has a lot of cavities that need to be filled."

The man replies "that must be hard on you."

The doctor replies "Not really I get paid every month to dril... read more

The other dentist is from England.

\- it keeps them white.

Tooth hurty.

… I assumed you offered a dental plan.

You brush them in the morning to keep your friends.

Credit of this joke goes to my dental hygienist

A flossitute.

His dentist built a standard dental plate and fitted it into his mouth and it worked just fine.

In three months, the man was back at his dentist. The dentist looked in his mouth, and the plate he had just put in was so deteriorated it was beyond repair.

The dentist was shocked that it ... read more

and what doesn't kill something makes it stronger,

are we really on the right track with all this dental hygiene stuff?

But they couldn't, because there's no dental records and everyone has the same DNA.

...and I asked if he had any crazy stories from his years in practice.

"Yes, actually. One time I cut a man's arm off."

"What, how!?"

"I could trouble you with the details, but I really just did it acciDENTALly."

and so much hate mail he had to shut down his dental practice

If you left Dental Floss in the kitchen



The Roaches would hang themselves!

DentalDentalDental

Little Johnny's dad picked him up from school to take him to a dental appointment.

Knowing the parts for the school play were supposed to be posted today, he asked his son if he got a part.

Johnny enthusiastically announced that he'd gotten a part. I play a man who's been married for... read more

Turns out it also helps with toothaches. It's trans-and-dental medication.

His patients wont be thrilled if they knew I never went to Dental College

But think about all the money I've saved on dental floss.

I told as I was taking away his dental implant.

Health Care at a minimum. Dental would be nice but not required.

He wanted to transcend dental medication.

AcciDENTALly

They don't have enough teeth for dental records, and they all have the same DNA.