UPJOKE
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Metaphors Jokes

I hate it when people use metaphors that are physically impossible.

It makes my blood boil.

A man struggles to not use Train metaphors

"No more!" he swore to himself. "Today's the day I finally change my one-track mind! Oh. Ok, I'll let that one go, but no more!"

He entered the meeting. Several minutes passed.

"Everyone let's try not to get off track." **Damnit! I did it again. That's the last one!**

"What I me...

Metaphors

People say I mangle metaphors, but you can’t make an omelet without beating a few dead horses.

Metaphors aren't like similes.

Metaphors are similes.

Why don't kleptomaniacs understand metaphors?

Because they take everything, literally.

Today, I met Bruce Lee's vegetarian brother, Broco Lee.

I met a few of his cousins too;

The one who can't take a joke, Serious Lee.

The one is always there last minute, Sudden Lee.

The one who doesn't understand Metaphors, Literal Lee.

The one who is always throwing shade, Sarcastic Lee.

The one who is so sure of himsel...

I hate it when people confuse reality with metaphors...

It makes my head literally explode!

Knock-Knock Joke given to me by a Star Wars fan

Knock Knock

Who's There?

Metaphors

Metaphors who?

Metaphors be with you

Why is it so hard to explain metaphors to a kleptomaniac?

Because they always take things... Literally

I have this weird problem where I can't understand metaphors, unless they are also ladder-related puns.

My psychologist keeps is trying to find some Holy Rail of a solution, but I'm pretty content to continue to sweep it under the rung.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

Anyone else confused by these new sexual metaphors?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

English Literature Class

Professor starts the literature class. "Today's lesson is metaphors. A metaphor conceptualizes and exaggerate a big thing into a small creative image. As an example you can say 'The snow is a white blanket' instead of saying that snow is white. Can anyone say a similar metaphor ? "

"Tom Crui...

What do Jedi Knights say to encourage the use of analogies?

Metaphors be with you

I have just read an interesting dictionary.

It had literally no metaphors.





I'll ^show^myself^out...

I was watching Star Wars in English Class

And a classmate says "metaphors be with you"

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