UPJOKE
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Irony of life!

The doctor hopes you fall ill.

The police hopes you become a criminal.

The lawyer hopes you get into trouble.

The priest wants you to get married.

The coffin maker wants you dead.

Only a thief wishes you prosperity in life!

Irony!!!!

There is no greater irony than dying in a living room.

Irony:

Hyphenated



Non-hyphenated

Had to explain what irony was to someone at church.

Apparently, "Being a carpenter and getting nailed to a wooden cross" isn't a good example.

History's biggest irony is that the Russian alphabet has no lowercase letters

It's all Capitalization.

What's the opposite of irony?

\- Wrinkly

My friend says I don't understand the meaning of "irony"

Despite the fact I keep telling him it's "metallic"

Define : Irony

Getting pregnant on a "pull-out" couch!

The irony of 2020

Was that no one could have seen it coming.

Karma and Irony are best friends

They go roaming the city one night looking for a place to eat.
They spot a homeless man warming his hands by a fire, and karma steals a belt lying next to him, laughing.
Irony stays behind and hands the belt back before catching up with Karma.
They then walk into a bar, and Karma says โ€œou...

The other day my friend was telling me i didnt know what irony meant

Which was ironic since we were at a bus stop

Edit: thanks for silver gold and front page, it means alot

What's another word for irony?

(Fe)lony

There are three things I love:

The Oxford comma, irony, and missed opportunities.

The irony of the fat acceptance movement...

is the inheirant lack of movement.

My friend told me that I don't understand irony

Which itself was ironic because it was a Wednesday

I live alone, so I am ironing my own clothes

Oh, the irony.

Irony is...

When Robinhood stops the poor from taking from the rich.

The irony about unvaccinated kids is....

That the jokes get old.

What do you call it when a Russian emperor uses irony to mock someone?

Tsarcasm

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

All about stress

Tits - natural anti-stress balls! The irony is that they come attached to the most effective thing to create stress!

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Irony of Indian law system

I have two questions for the lawmakers of our country:

1. If the legal age of a Man to get Sexually active is 18 years and the legal age for him to get married is 21... then what are we actually suggesting he should do these 3 years?

2. Now if the legal age for a Man to get married is ...

Irony will be the death of me.

What my mate said just before he fell into a blast furnace.

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Up until he died, my dad was a big believer in gains made by efficiency, and also irony.

He would have appreciated being run over by a hearse.

What's the definition of irony?

To not know the difference between a definition and an example.

There's a beautiful irony in the fact the history channel is showing less and less history...As if the history

Is in the past.

My favorite definition of irony:

A neck tattoo that says "I make good decisions."

"IRONY"...

"IRONY"...

This is short and to the point:
The Food Stamp Program, administered by the U.S. Department of Agriculture, is proud to be distributing this year the greatest amount of free Meals and Food Stamps ever, to 46 million people.
Meanwhile, the National Park Service, administered b...

Did you hear that the Irony Convention is in town?

For whatever reason, the pacifists are all up in arms about it!

I donโ€™t like my coffee like I like my irony

Hitting me unexpectedly after flying through the air or coming out of my computer.

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

My friend was taking the piss out of me today because I apparently don't understand what irony is.

Which is ironic because we were sat in a coffee shop at the time...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

The Irony of the World Cup rules...

The Japanese qualified for the next round because they have less yellow

My irony detector is defective.

It detects everything except irony.

The Paradox Association has fragmented due to internal conflicts.

Many members have subsequently joined The Irony Society, but leaders of both organizations have issued statements clarifying that simultaneous membership remains an unresolved issue.

Did you hear they're making a documentary about Arnold Schwarzenegger's work in comedy?

It's called Pumping Irony.

Pretty soon the only place you will be able to buy a Confederate flag will be the black market.

Oh the irony.

What do epileptics call ambulances?

Irony on wheels!

A man wished to die in an accident

The irony was not lost on him as, in the middle of this thought process, he tripped over his own feet and fell into oncoming traffic.

This joke kills.

My friends say that I don't understand irony...

Which is ironic because I don't even own an iron.

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

My mother taught me...

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm go...

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