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What’s the difference between Disney+ and po*n hub?

Disney + wants you to hate your stepmother.

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What’s the difference between a crab with large breasts and an aged transport hub ?

One is a busty crustacean and the other is a crusty bus station

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I was on PornHub the other day and there was an ad that read: 'free asian asshole pics'.

When I clicked on it it was just a picture of Xi Jinping.

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(NSFW) Coronavirus porn is going viral on PornHub..

What a bunch of sick fucks

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Why was Einstein horrified by PornHub?

Everything was relatives.

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What's Putin's favorite PornHub category?

MILFs, because he loves fucking Mother Russia

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Just got a job working on PornHub's website

Now I'm always working hard

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NSFW An Unusual Affliction

A man goes to his doctor to complain about what he believes is a social disease he's contracted.

"Doc, you've got to help me. My dick has turned completely orange!"

The Doc runs all the usual diagnostic tests, but they all come back showing he has a clean bill of health.

Baffled...

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I just bought PornHub Premium.

And now there aren’t any horny milfs in my area that want to have sex with me anymore.

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PornHub now requires all visitors to watch at least 5 minutes of dwarf MILF content before accessing other videos.

That's the bare mini mum.

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Dave comes back home from work to find his wife has left him a note 'Off to the grocery store'. He hasn't been 'getting any' so he decides that this is his chance. He turns on the computer and starts scrolling through PornHub.

He starts to masturbate and before long he's about to climax. All of a sudden his wife comes in, drops her grocery bags, runs over and gives him the best blowjob of his life. Then, without a word, she collects all the bags and goes to the kitchen.

The guy is sitting there stunned and amazed a...

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Farmer John and his bull

There was this farmer, Farmer John, who had a prize-winning bull.
Unfortunately, at the beginning of the breeding season, the bull had no interest in mating. Couldn't get it up at all.

Farmer John called Bill the veterinarian to come out and look at the bull. Bill checked the bull all over...

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PornHub removed my sex tape

They told me to try Vine

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I don't have enough bandwidth to connect to PornHub

Now my Fitbit will think I'm lazy

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The only company to truly care about LGBTQ+ people after pride is PornHub...

...they have a whole section for them all year long

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I can't believe the term "Overwatch" was searched more than "anal" last year on PornHub...

What is this world cumming to?

What do you call a black hat GitHub contributor?

An evil sourcerer

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I had sex with a vegan and didn't know she recorded it

Until I found the video on QuornHub

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The PornHub workers have one of the most riskiest jobs.

After all their jobs are NSFW.

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Why are incest videos so popular on PornHub right now?

Because West Virginia finally got internet access.

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Buy yourself a PornHub premium gift card...

And go fuck yourself.

Jones is driving past the state mental hospital when his left rear tire suffers a flat.

While Jones is changing the tire, another car goes by, running over the hub cap in which Jones was keeping the lug nuts. the nuts are all knocked into a nearby storm drain.

Jones is at a loss for what to do and is about to go call a cab when he hears a shout from behind the hospital fence, wh...

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During sex, I suddenly stopped and didn't move.

She was like, "What are you doing?" And I was like, "Hush, I saw this on PornHub, it's called Buffering"

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My state needs to enforce a statewide lockdown....

....so that PornHub can offer us the free premium service!

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I was in a job interview. The guy asked me if I was a risk taker.

I said yes.

He said how.

I said I once clicked the category 'Other' on PornHub.

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So PornHub recently revealed what people all over the world were searching most frequently; finally answering a question I've always asked...

What is this world coming to!?

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Whether you're a Redditor, a 4channer or a Tumblr...

We can all come together on PornHub

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[NSFW] Little Jonny's dad is called into the headmasters office for his sons misbehaviour. He arrives 10 minutes late.

"Sorry I'm late Mrs Deeny, I forgot to polish some nobs at work before leaving tonight. "

Mrs Deeny, looks up from her desk in disgust

"Yeah, I almost lost my job at the door knob factory last time I did that. To be fair they weren't too happy that I was walking around with my cock out...

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You have died and gone to hell

When you arrive in hell, you are greeted with a very happy and joyful Satan

Satan: WELCOME TO HELL!!!!! Please, let’s get you checked in and see where you will fit in our depths.

Satan scans the book of life. Locates your name

Satan: Ohhh, I see!!!! OH, WOW that is a lot of ti...

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Roses are red. Violets are blue...

PornHub is down, Facebook will do.

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Elon Musk: Tesla cars now have full self driving capabilities.

PornHub: "Tinder date comes in me in a Tesla on autopilot"

Job Opportunity for Flat Earthers

Because of the recent Arctic cold snap. Delta Airlines has been hiring de-icers in their Atlanta hub for the expected crowds at SuperBowl. Most of the jobs have been going to Flat Earthers, because by definition, they don't believe in *Global* Warming but are fine with Plane Warming.

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A study has revealed that curvy hips indicate smart women who deliver intelligent children.

So that's what my son's been looking for on PornHub, a smart woman.

Did you hear about the new Christmas restaurant downtown?

They have an eggs Benedict dish that they service on car hub caps - it’s called “there’s no plates like chrome for the hollandaise”

Credit to Colin Mochrie.

No place like home...

Tom had lived in New York City for 30 years now. As he looked out the window of his office suite, he realized it was Christmas Eve.

He had been so absorbed with the company business and without a family of his own, had really not been paying attention to the holidays. As he stared at t...

Wife refusing to leave.

So this was told by my hubs. He doesn't use reddit, so he asked me to post it.




Police: Sir, we can't make your wife just leave the house when she has no where to go.



Husband: That's not true. I bought her a place years ago, just for her and she refuses to go there....

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I was standing just next to Aj1t Pa1 when he was using Tor Browser ...

I peeked at his PornHub account and his username was AJ1T_3.14Inches

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A drunk walks into the doctors office.

So this drunk goes to the doctor's office and says "Doc, I had a rough one last night. Got blackout drunk, broke into the Zoo and I think I got fucked by an elephant."

Doctor says, "why do you say that?" The drunk drops his pants and says, "well just look at my asshole" Doc can see it is stre...

Enrique Peña Nieto, Malala Yousafzai, and Donald Trump are walking along a beach

It's a bit of an oldie, and I think the last time I heard it, it came off as pretty racist. But I think the current political climate allows me to rehash it better.

Enrique Peña Nieto, who is the Mexican President, is walking along the beach one day with the US President, Donald Trump, and p...

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Roses are red, violets are blue...

I've got no girlfriend, so porn hub will do.

What's a teenage fish's favorite website?

Prawn Hub

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