UPJOKE
centercentrecentralcivic centerdown townheartgatewayportionpartmiddleterminalcentersflagshipcorridorcrossroads

Hub Jokes

What’s the difference between Disney+ and po*n hub?

Disney + wants you to hate your stepmother.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

(NSFW) Coronavirus porn is going viral on PornHub..

What a bunch of sick fucks

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

PornHub's working on a new feature.

It's currently in mastur-beta.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

PornHub removed my sex tape

They told me to try Vine

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why was Einstein horrified by PornHub?

Everything was relatives.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's Putin's favorite PornHub category?

MILFs, because he loves fucking Mother Russia

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just bought PornHub Premium.

And now there aren’t any horny milfs in my area that want to have sex with me anymore.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was on PornHub the other day and there was an ad that read: 'free asian asshole pics'.

When I clicked on it it was just a picture of Xi Jinping.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Just got a job working on PornHub's website

Now I'm always working hard

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What’s the difference between a crab with large breasts and an aged transport hub ?

One is a busty crustacean and the other is a crusty bus station

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I don't have enough bandwidth to connect to PornHub

Now my Fitbit will think I'm lazy

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why are incest videos so popular on PornHub right now?

Because West Virginia finally got internet access.

What do you call a black hat GitHub contributor?

An evil sourcerer

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

NSFW An Unusual Affliction

A man goes to his doctor to complain about what he believes is a social disease he's contracted.

"Doc, you've got to help me. My dick has turned completely orange!"

The Doc runs all the usual diagnostic tests, but they all come back showing he has a clean bill of health.

Baffled...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Welcome to PornHub!

We will be looking forward to you hard at work here!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just found a pirated copy of "Uncut Gems" on PornHub.

It was a little longer than I would have liked.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The PornHub workers have one of the most riskiest jobs.

After all their jobs are NSFW.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Porn-hub opened a new sandwich fetish page...

You could say they created a new sub-genre.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I had sex with a vegan and didn't know she recorded it

Until I found the video on QuornHub

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I can't believe the term "Overwatch" was searched more than "anal" last year on PornHub...

What is this world cumming to?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The only company to truly care about LGBTQ+ people after pride is PornHub...

...they have a whole section for them all year long

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

PornHub now requires all visitors to watch at least 5 minutes of dwarf MILF content before accessing other videos.

That's the bare mini mum.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dave comes back home from work to find his wife has left him a note 'Off to the grocery store'. He hasn't been 'getting any' so he decides that this is his chance. He turns on the computer and starts scrolling through PornHub.

He starts to masturbate and before long he's about to climax. All of a sudden his wife comes in, drops her grocery bags, runs over and gives him the best blowjob of his life. Then, without a word, she collects all the bags and goes to the kitchen.

The guy is sitting there stunned and amazed a...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was in a job interview. The guy asked me if I was a risk taker.

I said yes.

He said how.

I said I once clicked the category 'Other' on PornHub.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So PornHub recently revealed what people all over the world were searching most frequently; finally answering a question I've always asked...

What is this world coming to!?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Last night, during sex, I suddenly stopped and didn't move...

She was like, "What the hell are you doing!?"

And I was like, "Hush baby, I saw this on PornHub....it's called 'buffering'."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Farmer John and his bull

There was this farmer, Farmer John, who had a prize-winning bull.
Unfortunately, at the beginning of the breeding season, the bull had no interest in mating. Couldn't get it up at all.

Farmer John called Bill the veterinarian to come out and look at the bull. Bill checked the bull all over...

Where do crustaceans get their adult content?

PronHub

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Whether you're a Redditor, a 4channer or a Tumblr...

We can all come together on PornHub

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Roses are red. Violets are blue...

PornHub is down, Facebook will do.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[NSFW] Little Jonny's dad is called into the headmasters office for his sons misbehaviour. He arrives 10 minutes late.

"Sorry I'm late Mrs Deeny, I forgot to polish some nobs at work before leaving tonight. "

Mrs Deeny, looks up from her desk in disgust

"Yeah, I almost lost my job at the door knob factory last time I did that. To be fair they weren't too happy that I was walking around with my cock out...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Elon Musk: Tesla cars now have full self driving capabilities.

PornHub: "Tinder date comes in me in a Tesla on autopilot"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A study has revealed that curvy hips indicate smart women who deliver intelligent children.

So that's what my son's been looking for on PornHub, a smart woman.

Did you hear about the new Christmas restaurant downtown?

They have an eggs Benedict dish that they service on car hub caps - it’s called “there’s no plates like chrome for the hollandaise”

Credit to Colin Mochrie.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was standing just next to Aj1t Pa1 when he was using Tor Browser ...

I peeked at his PornHub account and his username was AJ1T_3.14Inches

Job Opportunity for Flat Earthers

Because of the recent Arctic cold snap. Delta Airlines has been hiring de-icers in their Atlanta hub for the expected crowds at SuperBowl. Most of the jobs have been going to Flat Earthers, because by definition, they don't believe in *Global* Warming but are fine with Plane Warming.

Jones is driving past the state mental hospital when his left rear tire suffers a flat.

While Jones is changing the tire, another car goes by, running over the hub cap in which Jones was keeping the lug nuts. the nuts are all knocked into a nearby storm drain.

Jones is at a loss for what to do and is about to go call a cab when he hears a shout from behind the hospital fence, wh...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Roses are red, violets are blue...

I've got no girlfriend, so porn hub will do.

What's a teenage fish's favorite website?

Prawn Hub

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A drunk walks into the doctors office.

So this drunk goes to the doctor's office and says "Doc, I had a rough one last night. Got blackout drunk, broke into the Zoo and I think I got fucked by an elephant."

Doctor says, "why do you say that?" The drunk drops his pants and says, "well just look at my asshole" Doc can see it is stre...

Wife refusing to leave.

So this was told by my hubs. He doesn't use reddit, so he asked me to post it.




Police: Sir, we can't make your wife just leave the house when she has no where to go.



Husband: That's not true. I bought her a place years ago, just for her and she refuses to go there....

No place like home...

Tom had lived in New York City for 30 years now. As he looked out the window of his office suite, he realized it was Christmas Eve.

He had been so absorbed with the company business and without a family of his own, had really not been paying attention to the holidays. As he stared at t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

You have died and gone to hell

When you arrive in hell, you are greeted with a very happy and joyful Satan

Satan: WELCOME TO HELL!!!!! Please, let’s get you checked in and see where you will fit in our depths.

Satan scans the book of life. Locates your name

Satan: Ohhh, I see!!!! OH, WOW that is a lot of ti...

Enrique Peña Nieto, Malala Yousafzai, and Donald Trump are walking along a beach

It's a bit of an oldie, and I think the last time I heard it, it came off as pretty racist. But I think the current political climate allows me to rehash it better.

Enrique Peña Nieto, who is the Mexican President, is walking along the beach one day with the US President, Donald Trump, and p...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.