UPJOKE
chimneypipeflue pipeductpipeworkfireplaceconduitflukehookahsmokerfurnaceashtrayboilervalvepipes

Got vaccinated, avoided swine flues. Got vaccinated, avoided bird flues. Then I bought a house with two fireplaces.

Got chimney flues.
upvote downvote report

Why was Santa sick on the day after Christmas?

A couple of the chimneys he went down had the flue
upvote downvote report

I'm opening a new chimney sweep, soldering supplies, and dessert business.

It's called Flue, Flux, Flan.
upvote downvote report

Why was the chimney sick?

Because it had the flue.
upvote downvote report

How did Harry Potter travel during the pandemic ?

“ flue” powder
upvote downvote report

Britain used to send kids up chimneys to sweep them. It was hazardous and many got ill and died.

Until we developed the flue vaccine.
upvote downvote report

Our whole house has become sick

Even the chimney has the flue.
upvote downvote report

The CDC is warning people about biohazards in chimneys, but my dumb Facebook friends won't listen.

They keep saying "It's just the flue, bro."
upvote downvote report

Why does Santa have to be extra careful with his health around Christmas Eve?

It's flue season.
upvote downvote report

Somebody asked me what a spoonerism was....

I haven't got a cooking flue.
upvote downvote report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Little Johnny uses the word Contagious in a sentence.

A teacher gives her kids an assignment. Use the word contagious in your everyday life and report back to me tomorrow.
The next day all the kids are raising their hand.
The teacher calls on little Susie.
Little Susie, my little brother has the flue and if he sneezes on me I wi...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.

Do Not Sell My Personal Information