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Floyd Jokes

Say what you want about Floyd Mayweather

He can't read it anyway

The American education system obviously listen to Pink Floyd.

They've left those kids a loan.

EDIT: Woke up to find THIS :O

What's Cookie Monster's favourite Pink Floyd song?

Comfortably Nom nom nom nom.

What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common?

Their last big hit was the wall.

Pink Floyd and Led Zeppelin agreed to take care of each other’s gardens.

This means Roger Waters Robert’s Plants.

What do Donald Trump, Pink Floyd, and Dale Earnhardt Sr have in common?

Their biggest hits were all "The Wall"

How Rednecks Get Things Done

"Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?"

"Yes. What can I do for you?"

"I'm calling to report 'bout my neighbor Virgil Smith. He's hidin' marijuana
inside his firewood! Don't quite know how he gets it inside them logs, but
he's hidin' it there."

"Thank you very much for ...

Muhammad Ali, Mike Tyson, and Floyd Mayweather are waiting patiently for a glass of sangria.

If that's not a good punchline, I don't know what is.

When I get stoned I like to listen to Pink Floyd & eat a lot.

I have become comfortably plump.

Jimmy Kimmel should have Floyd Mayweather read mean tweets after the fight

Oh wait

As a Pink Floyd fan, nothing makes me angrier than seeing a vegan eating pudding.

Because how can you have any pudding if you don't eat yer meat?

What's the difference between Floyd's Summer of Love and the Jan 6 Capitol tour?

About $2 billion, give or take

Floyd Mayweather won because of an unfair advantage.

He gets to practice in the gym all day and then goes home and practices on his family.

What is Donald Trump's favorite Pink Floyd album?

Dark side of the Moon, for it's eclectic instrumentation and higher than average production values.

Anthony Joshua 21 KOs, David Haye 26 KOs, Floyd Mayweather 27 KOs...

Bill Cosby 30 KOs.

I think that the president and his cabinet listened to Pink Floyd

"We don't need no education" -Devos

"All in all its just another brick in the wall" -Trump

Floyd Mayweather's true record is 51-0...

They forgot to count the 3 times he beat his wife.

What was the cause for Floyd Mayweather's first loss?

He couldn't read his opponent's moves.

Did you hear about Trump getting Pink Floyd back together?

Only problem is, he's gonna make them pay for every brick in the wall.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What did the man do after listening to a Pink Floyd album for two hours?

Skip to the next track

How do we know Floyd Mayweather isn't a bomb?

Because he can't tell the time.

Why does Floyd Mayweather have "TGIF" written on his boxing shoes?

To remind him that "Toes Go in First."

The reason Mayberry was so peaceful and quiet was because nobody was married. Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam, Earnest T Bass, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara and, of course, Opie were all single.

The only married person was Otis, & he was the town drunk.

Floyd Mayweather Jr must listen to his opponents to win ...

Because he definitely can't read them

If you start the Dark Side of the Moon by Pink Floyd and the passion of the Christ at the same time the scenes don’t match up at all

It turns out Jesus was more of a nine inch nails guy

So in this upcoming boxing match, Soulja Boy is being trained by Floyd Mayweather

Where as Chris Brown is just getting another girlfriend to train on

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

During a Pink Floyd concert I went to toilet and there was a glory hole in one of the cubicles.

"Suck it, then," said the guy on the other side.

I said, "No."

"Why?" he asked, defeated.

I said, "All in all you're just another dick in the wall."

Everybody has been reading about the fight today

Except Floyd Mayweather.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How to fire an Employee...

All the members of the company's Board of Directors were called into the Chairman's office, one after another, until only Ted, the junior member, was left sitting outside.

Finally it was his turn to be summoned.

Ted entered the office to find the Chairman and the other four Directors s...

I've heard the crime rate in the Philippines drops when Manny Pacquiao fights...

The crime rate also drops in Floyd Mayweather's home when Floyd Mayweather fights.

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