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Flatulent Jokes

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What do you call a flatulent, captive audience?

Ass-toot observers

A flatulent man goes to the doctor

He arrives at the doctor's office and describes his problem: "You see, doctor, I have this terrible problem with my flatulence. I'm farting all the time! Fortunately they neither smell nor sound, if not it would be intolerable! Just right now, while we have been speaking, I've had to let go of a few...

What do flatulent Egyptian twins share?

They have a Toot-in-common.

What do you call a flatulent terrorist?

Osama Bean Laiden.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How do you inherit a flatulent vagina?

It's bequeefed to you.

Did you hear about the flatulent Egyptians that met on Tinder?

They had TOOT in common.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a flatulent homosexual boxer?

Gassius Gay

[OC] What was Muhammad Ali’s flatulent brother’s name?

Gaseous Clay

An elderly woman visits the doctor for, ahem, a little problem.

"You see, doctor..." and she leans in to whisper conspiratorially... "I have flatulence. But you wouldn't know it because it makes no sound and it has no odor. In fact, I'm flatulent right now. Right as we speak, I swear. To be honest I'm not sure I should even bother to do anything about it, it's s...

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What do you say to someone who talks too much ?

In promulgating your esoteric cogitations or articulating your superficial sentimentalities, and amicable philosophical or psychological observations, beware of platitudinous ponderosa. Let your conversational communications possess a compacted conciseness, a clarified comprehensibility, a coalescen...

The Queen gets older...

As she grew older, the Queen became rather flatulent. One day, she was receiving foreign ambassadors when she was unable to stop herself from loudly breaking wind. Immediately, the quick-witted French ambassador stepped forward, made an elegant bow and very gallantly said: “I beg Your Majesty’s apol...

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