I started a job making plastic Dracula figurines but there’s only two of us in the production line.

I have to make every second Count.

I make wooden figurines for a living, which has proved to be a very good business.

I get a lot of requests to make animals, as they can be used to decorate at all times of the year. I’ve recently been working on a variety of birds for the spring season, because it’s never too early to start working ahead.
I often make a few mistakes when making animals because of the long hour...

What do you call a murder over a set of porcelain figurines in the middle of a rice field?

A knick-knack-paddy-wack

(100% stolen from somewhere, I still think it's funny)

I can't stop making figurines of Frodo

It's hobbit forming.

Police were called to the scene of a murder

A man escaped a mental hospital and stole some porcelain figurines. Later that night he snuck into a farmers field and used them to beat a cow to death with them.

It was the first documented case of a nic-nac patty wack

So there's this boy who loves tractors

He lived on a farm, and watched the tractors drive by all day. He subscribed to tractor magazines, collected tractor figurines, had loads of tractor posters on his wall and even had some DVDs of tractor documentaries. He lived his whole childhood loving tractors.
On his 17th birthday, his dad sa...

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