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Lacquer Jokes

My uncle accidentally fell into a vat of lacquer.

He didn't have a good life, but he had a beautiful finish.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My Father’s Favorite Joke

One day, a man goes to a remote village and goes to the pub. He is completely taken with how incredible the bar is. Eventually he speaks to the barman and tells him how he has travelled the world but that this is the most beautiful bar he has ever seen. The barman says:
“You like this bar, hr...

What’s a pirates favourite paint?

Davy Jones Lacquer.

Little Johnny had an accident.

One day, while working on the family farm, Little Johnny fell and badly damaged his left eye. The doctors couldn’t save it, so it was removed.

His family didn’t have the money for a fancy prosthesis, so his dad whittled him a wooden eye, and carefully painted and lacquered it. From a distanc...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My absent minded friend

A friend of mine was asked by his wife to tidy up the bathroom. She headed out on her Saturday afternoon shopping trip while he set to work.

One of his tasks was to lacquer the toilet seat.
He finished this and the other work and went out to watch the football in the pub.

When he ...

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