I don't understand why books are rare in Fahrenheit 451...

I would expect them to be well done

My dad said -459.67 Fahrenheit is the coldest things can get

I just said "0K, Boomer"

I just read Fahrenheit 451

Or as my grandkids will call it, 11/22/2063

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A subtle masturbation joke from Fahrenheit 451

“When he came back he hid his hands under the table. Beatty laughed. “Let’s have your hands in sight, Montag. Not that we don’t trust you, understand, but —“
They all laughed.

I saw my kid reading Fahrenheit 451 and I asked him, “How do you like it?”

Him: It’s pretty lit.

I accidentally combined Fahrenheit and milliliters

FmL

Swedish astronomer Andres Celcius died in 1744 at the age of 43

Though his rival, Fahrenheit, was convinced he was 103.

I don't like Fahrenheit. I don't like Celsius. I don't like Kelvin.

I prefer to measure my degrees in Radians.

-40° outside sounds brutally cold, Fahrenheit or Celsius.

My friend Kelvin just rolled his eyes.

An IQ below 70 qualifies you for having an intellectual disability

Now I just need to figure out if that's in Celcius or Fahrenheit

Math teacher: "What do you call an angle of 90 degrees?"

Me: "Fahrenheit or Celsius?"

"Hey man look at that new trainee, She is hot, I think she is 36C"

Out of nowhere HR Manager comes behind me and says "What did you just say?"

I replies "Do you want to hear it in Fahrenheit ?"

Posted on my Facebook group that it's 40 below outside.

Some responded, is that Fahrenheit or Centigrade?

If the average world temperature rises 2 degrees Celsius, mankind is doomed.

That is why America measures temperature in Fahrenheit.

A man from Baltimore dies and goes to hell...

He had been a bad man his entire life and therefore the devil made sure to give him extra work in the hottest fiery pit of hell. After a week goes by, the devil stops by to see how miserable the man is, but instead finds the man happily going about his work. He asks the man:
"Why are you so damn ...

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An Engineer Goes To Hell (repost from r/AskReddit, all credit to armaha)

A professional engineer dies and because of some misfiled paperwork, ends up in hell. Trudging through the sweltering heat, eventually he comes across Satan and says, "You know, with a little work, we can probably cool this place off..."
At first, Satan is enraged and prepares to unleash fury on ...

News: Trump inauguration met with record high temperatures.

451 degrees Fahrenheit.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I was a kid I put paper in an oven to get it to burn...

...but the knob only went up to 450 degrees Fahrenheit.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is cold?

What is cold?
(note: to get the temperature into Fahrenheit: multiply by 9, divide by 5, then add 32)

+10°C
The inhabitants of Helsinki (Finland) turn off their heating.
The Laps (inhabitants of Lapland) plant flowers.

+5°C
The Laps take a sun-bath (if the sun gets over the...

What did the man with mercury poisoning say?

It's 83 degrees Fahrenheit and 28 degrees Celsius.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Cock Dippers!

A Chinese, an American and a Nigerian were out by the pool.

The American dips his cock in the water and says " It seems that the temperature of this pool water is 85 degree fahrenheit."

To test this, the Chinese dips his cock in the water and says " To be accurate, the temperature of ...

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