An elderly couple in their 90s go to a divorce lawyer.

They tell him they'd like to file for divorce. He looks at them and asks, "Why would you get a divorce at your age?" The husband replies, "Well, we wanted to wait until the kids were dead."

I know what 90s girls want

They really really really wanna zig-a-zig ahhh!

Kids these days have no idea how good it was growing up in the 90s!

(born on December 31st, 1999)

How did every joke in the 90s start?

fwd:fwd:fwd:fwd:fwd:fwd:fwd:fwd:fwd:fwd:fwd:...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Al Gore is in the wrong line of work

Some people's names match their careers surprisingly well. Imagine a psychic named Krystal Ball or a stylist named Barbera Cutter.

But Al Gore is a failure in this regard. He had the perfect opportunity to start a math rock band in the 80s or 90s and just chose to not. It should have been fa...

You know you’re a 90s kid when...

your vaccinations were mandatory and no one in your class got measles.

Did you hear about the guy stuck in the 90s?

He got pulled over for speeding.

My Girlfriend couldn’t remember the name of a certain 90s sitcom.

I told her, Blossom (that’a my nickname for her), let’s take this Step by Step. We are far from Perfect Strangers, so I will Coach you through this. As Time Goes By you will see that I’m a Smart Guy, but If I can’t help you, we will start calling our Friends for help. Except for your brother Frasier...

90s kids won't get this . . .

Social Security benefits.

When I was a boy, sometime in the mid-90s, I had absolutely zero friends. My concerned mother brought in the neighbor kids for a dreaded 'play date'..

It started out just awful. Everyone ignored me and horsed around. Once they started trying to wreck my moms furniture, I had to take out my secret weapon.

My dad had scored an early VHS release of the last years most popular movie. I could have been the only one in the country with this mo...

This sums up the 90s

90+91+92+93+94+95+96+97+98+99 = 945

In Moscow, between the '80s and the '90s

Two friends are waiting in the breadline, when one of them says:

"Ugh, I can't take it anymore, we're waiting from 4 hours and still nothing."

"Yeah, and so? What are you gonna do?"

"Know what? Let's end all this! I'm gonna kill Gorbachëv!"

And he walks away.

After...

Only 90s kids will get this...

What did Jeffrey Dahmer ask Lorena Bobbitt?

*Are you going to eat that?*

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Everyone's talking about the 90s like it was almost thirty years ago...

Oh.

...Fuck.

And elderly couple...

hire an attorney and tell him they want to get divorced. He looks at them in shocked disbelief and exclaims, "Henry! Dorothy! You are both in your 90s. You've been married for 72 years. Why do you want a divorce now?"

Dorothy looks him in the eye and says, "It's been awful, but we wanted...

Jobs from the 90s that aren’t around anymore:

Steve

A woman in her 90s told another "My joints are weak".

The later replied "That's because you are not rolling them tight enough honey".

Living to 90

So a guy asks his doctor, "Do you think I'll live to 90?"

The doctor says, "Well, that depends. Do you drink?"

"No."

"Do you smoke?"

"No."

"Do you gamble?"

"No."

"Do you chase women?"

"No."

"Well," says the doctor, "let me ask you this: ...

How does the kid tell you that their grandparents called?

60s kids: Grandma called.

70s kids: Gramps called.

80s kids: Granny called.

90s kids: Grandmother called.

Kids now: Boomerang.

Newlywed Woman In Her 90s Is Interviewed

There was a lady in her 90s who became a sort of local celebrity because she had recently gotten married. The local news station decided to interview her. The interviewer asked questions like how it was to be a newlywed in her 90s.

"This isn't my first husband, so it's not much different than...

How do '90s kids count to 6?

Uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco, cinco, seis.

I don't remember 90s music much.

It's all just a Blur.

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