This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

The Prince of Denmark wanted to know the proportion of women in his country who were prostitutes.

So he called his friend Horatio.

Why do bakeries in Denmark add so much sugar to their pastries?

If they didn't, they would be sweetish.

Who's Denmark's greatest Zombie actor?

Rigor Mortissen

Olympic Sailing results are in!

Denmark have taken gold

Finland have taken silver

Somalia have taken a middle aged couple who were on a worldwide cruise

What do you call weed from Denmark?

Dansk kush.

Have you heard about the new law that has passed?

They passed a law saying you have to have your headlights on when itโ€™s raining in Denmark.

Problem is, when I get in the car, how am I supposed to know if itโ€™s raining in Denmark?

What country is known for cave paintings?

Denmark

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

A 20 year old man visited his 100 year old grandmother

The 20 year old asked what was her secret to living so long.
His grandmother replied, "I will tell you if you do one thing for me, tell me how grains of sand on every beach in the entire world!"
The 20 year old planning to travel the world took this challenge and set off counting every grain ...

Punchline not included.

Timmy : I'm Hungary.

Mum : Why don't you Czech the fridge.

Timmy : Ok, I'm Russian to the kitchen.

Mum : Hmm...maybe you'll find some Turkey.

Timmy : Yeah, but its all covered in Greece. Yuck !

Mum : There is Norway you can eat that.

Timmy : I know, I gu...

The hare and the tortoise

The hare and the tortoise were having a rematch. This time, they decided to race through Europe, starting with London. The plan was to race to Dover, get the ferry across, and go along the French coast, across Belgium, Germany, and head north through Denmark.

The hare figured that his fur wo...

Why do Icelandic ships have barcodes?

The striking dock workers complained there is Norway they can go to a ship with a clipboard, Denmark it as arrived and Finnish the whole business before sunset. New tech helped Sweden the deal.

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

You have two cows..

USA: You have two cows. You outsource a farm to milk them and sell the milk to those who can afford it. You then use the profit to buy someone else's cow for your butcher to make steak with.

Russia: You have two cows. When you get sober you remember that the mafia took them away from you, so ...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Not exactly a joke, butthe usually get a great reaction. Caution: not for use with those who lack basic math skills.

Pick a number from 1 to 9, but don't tell me what it is. Multiply that number by 9. If the the result is a two digit number, add the two digits together. Now subtract 5.

Where the letters of the alphabet correspond to the numbers 1 though 26, pick the letter associated with the number you hav...

This is naut, ok?

If America has 'astronauts' and Russia has 'cosmonauts', does Denmark have 'deeznauts'?

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Food and Country

Yesterday I was so Hungary, I decided to Czech if there was any food.
I was Russian to the fridge, but found only a Turkey full of Greece.
Iran to the store to get some salt, pepper, Chile and Korea-nder, because I was in the mood for some Sweden sour.
I found Iraq of pork chops but there w...

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