Daybreak Jokes

In Soviet Russia, an American spy tries to blend in...

George Keats had trained 20 years for this moment. He had mastered the Russian language in its native accent. He learned all of Russia's customs and social graces. He memorized Moscow streetmaps and knew every back-alley there was. He swo... read more

While drinking, the Bartender tells the man that they have a local challenge, which no one has ever actually successfully completed. However, the prize is free liquor from that bar for the rest of the man's life. The man, never one to back down, decides to bite, and asks the Bartender about the chal... read more

A party official comes up and says, "Hello comrades! There isn't enough bread to feed everyone today, so no bread will be given to any Jews."

All of the Jews, used to disappointment, shrug, pack up their things and go home.

Two hours go by as the snow keeps falling. The official return... read more

One morning before daybreak, Little Johnny scatters out onto the front porch with a handful of duck tape. He's stopped by his grandfather, who rests comfortably on an old rocking chair... his usual morning leisure. The grandfather notices the duck tape...

 

"Whatcha doin' wit... read more

An old farmer is known across the state for his giant pumpkins.

Every year he takes the blue ribbon at the state fair for biggest pumpkin, and every year his town throws a Pumpkin Parade for him where he drives the winner down Main Street in the back of his pickup, the local marching band pla... read more

He is in the middle of nowhere but spots a small farmhouse in the distance and walks there. He knocks on the door and is greeted by the farmer and explains the situation. The farmer let's him use the phone but the line is down and the farmer suggests he stays the night at the farm with him and his w... read more