UPJOKE
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When I was a child, I was obsessed with the difference between sine and cosine.

Later on, I realized it was just a phase.

A thief stole a sine and a cosine... He took the two identities to a beach. However, they were too heavy for him to carry.

He wanted to keep them under the sand, but the beach was so narrow that it could only contain one of them: sine or cosine. He decided that, using his mathematical skills, that he would stack sine over cosine - but that resulted in tan! He did not want to get tan. So he stacked cosine over sine... <...

Sine, cosine and ln(x) are at a party

Sine approaches cosine and says, "Hey, what's ln(x) doing over in the corner by himself?". Cosine responds, "You see, ln(x) doesn't integrate very well".

My girlfriend told me I’m like negative cosine multiplied by tangent...

My friends told me not to worry about it, but I think it’s a negative sine.

Your momma's so fat, she's like the negative cosine of X...

They both go down after pi

Mr Sine and Miss Cosine go on their honeymoon..

Mr Sine and Miss Cosine get married and head for their honeymoon to a seaside destination. So they're chilling by the beach, and sipping on their drinks, and things get naughty soon. During a lovemaking session on the beach, Sine whispers into Cosine's ear, "It's a good thing I'm not on top, or we'...

I've been reading a book about the shape of the mathematical functions of sine and cosine...

It has its ups and downs...

In Colorado they took down the mile marker for 420

In Colorado they took down the mile marker sign for 420
They were afraid that the potheads were going to try and steal it.
They replaced it with a mile marker 419.9999 repeating sign
Well this caused the sign to get stolen by the MATH nerds,
who also swiftly stole the cosine and...

I'm trying to buy one of those triangle-shaped cabins, but my credit isn't good enough to get a loan.

I'll have to get someone to cosine.

Short Math joke

I used to date a girl named hypotenuse, a while back. But then she dumped me for some dude named cosine. Now she's my x.

Hey girl , is the cosine of you positive?

Cos you're acute angle.

Mr. Sine and his missus Cosine went for their honeymoon on a beach

Mr. Sine and his missus Cosine went for their honeymoon on a beach and got a Tan.

When they returned it took them a Sec to find that they needed a new Cot.

If you have bad credit, a trigonometrist is the best friend to have.

He can cosine for you.

I wanted to take ownership of a building shaped like a triangle.

But I couldn’t get anyone to cosine.

Why did the student need to get a guardian to help them with their trigonometry homework?

They needed someone to cosine.

I never believed my teacher when she said I’d need Pythagoras later in life

Wait until my partner finds out I can’t cosine a loan.

I was so bad at math my bank refused to give me a loan

Thank god I had someone to cosine

Two triangles are having difficulty buying an apartment.

It turns out they needed to cosine.

A tangent applied for a credit card, but was denied.

He couldn't find anyone willing to cosine.

What's a mathematician's favorite book?

*A tale of two cosines*

A conversation between a forgetful mathematician and a blonde

Mathematician: "Excuse me, I seem to have forgotten the value for the sine function. Do you know what it is?"

Blonde: Ah???

Mathematician: No, not that, that's for cosine.

Blonde: Oh...

Mathematician: That's it! Thank you!

Geeky trigonometry joke my dad used to tell me

What sound does a horse make while walking?
*Clop, clop.*

What sound does a horse make while walking uphill?
*Clop, clop* multiplied by the cosine of the slope angle.

What did the car dealer ask the oscilloscope?

sin or cosine?

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