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Contracting Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There’s this new medicine that prevents you from contracting HIV from oral sex.

It’s called Meal PrEP

Scientists confirmed today that anteaters are incapable of contracting Covid...

Apparently they're filled with anty-bodies

What do you do with your partner after contracting the coronavirus?

Netflix and ill.

At first I was really against contracting a brain parasite

But then it grew on me.

The lead singer of Disturbed has decided he’s not going to self quarantine after contracting Covid-19

He’s down with the sickness

What do you call a healthcare worker that doesn’t self isolate after contracting COVID-19?

A hippocritic oaf.

After contracting Covid-19 Famous Rapper DMX has promised to infect every human on earth with the virus.

This is apart of his earlier promise that "X gonna give it to ya"

In WW I, US soldiers could be court martialed for contracting gonorrhoea.

That's why they call it a "dishonorable discharge".

Luckily, after contracting COVID 19, Donald Trump got back to full health. It would be a huge tragedy for the whole world to lose him...

...before he did his time.

How government contracts work...

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House in DC:One is from New York , another is from Tennessee and the third, is from
Florida . All three go with a White House official to examine the fence.

The Florida contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measur...

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