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Brats Jokes

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The kids asked what was for dinner and I told them "Scraps". They started crying. Spoiled brats, it's really hard to get food at the moment thanks to the panic buying.

And it was a stupid name for a dog anyway.



(Obligatory thank-you edit for the silver!)

(Narwhal! Narwhals are cool!)

I went to a great restaurant the other day -- it has absolute best brats, franks, and other sausages I've ever had!

It was literally the wurst place in town.

I just ran over some sausages

Those brats never saw it coming

I hate when my mom grills brats for dinner

She’s the würst

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A fourth-generation prostitute goes home to her great-grandmother's house for a family dinner...

She begins complaining to her family about work. "Geeze! Men these days complain about paying $50 for a blowjob! It's hard work! I *earn* that money!"

Mom, who was a hooker in the 1980s laughs. "Fifty bucks!? You're complaining about that? When I was on the streets, we were lucky to get $20!"...

I like hotdogs more than brats

Brats are just the wurst!

My recipe for vodka-flavoured brats never caught on.

It was the Absolut wurst.

We all know that no matter how kind you are, a German child is kinder

But let me tell you something, when they’re being brats, they’re the wurst!

4th of July picnic

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "How was your 4th of July picnic?" the bartender asks. "Horrible. Everyone came down with food poisoning," the guy replies. "I knew the hot dogs might have gone bad, but turns out the brats were the wurst."

My wife and I really should get a divorce, but we're staying together because of our kids

Neither of us want custody of those little brats...

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A cattle rancher walks into a bar...

He walks up and orders a strong drink, "herding cattle is tough work!"

The bartender nods.

In walks a middle-aged woman, who orders two strong drinks, "Cattle? Try herding cats! I've got eight of them!"

The bartender raises an eyebrow, but nods.

Then comes a preschool t...

You know one the main reasons Jeffrey Dahmer got caught was because his freezer stopped working and the smell became so bad the neighbors were complaining.

The cops came to his door and said "We heard you were keeping a bunch of spoiled brats in here"

Why did the kids get in trouble for eating the sausages?

They were brats

Did you hear about the chain of German restaurants opening up this year?

They're going to be serving Sausages, Brats, Anne Franks.

What does a cannibal bring to a barbecue? (OC)

Brats!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There is a new teacher in a school, and she is sent to the worst class with the laziest and the most spoiled kids.

The new teacher starts introducing herself to the first-graders, asking some questions to them, hoping to get them to like her.

She decided to start the lesson in a fun way to get the children's attention. So she starts drawing some pictures on the whiteboard and asks the children what has s...

Common ground among the German people

What are the German people in agreement with when discussing over-entitled children and expired sausages?

That Spoiled Brats are the Wurst

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Jew sits on a bus in Nazi Germany and reads a Nazi newspaper.

Someone sitting next to him asks "Why are you, a Jew, reading a Nazi newspaper?" The Jew answers "Look, I'm broke, I hate my job. my wife's a terror, and my children are brats. But I get to ride the bus half an hour every day and read the paper. What should I do? Read the Jewish papers, with stories...

The Moth

A moth went into a podiatrist's office, and the podiatrist said, "What seems to be the problem?"
The moth replied, "What's the problem?! Where do I even begin? For one thing, I'm breaking my back day in and day out, working long hours for next to no pay at a thankless job where my horrible...

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