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Boozing Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man wakes up in bed after a night of hard boozing...

His first thought is that he's in big trouble with his wife, but she waltzes into the room with a sunshiny grin and hands him a tray loaded with breakfast in bed. While he's eating, she slips under the covers and gives him a deliriously good blowjob.

"I don't get it, honey," the guy says. "I...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Mocho man,,,

A typical macho man married a typical good looking lady, and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules. "I'll be home when I want, if I want, what time I want, and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table, unless I tell you that I won't be home for din...

Billy Bob was impressed with Al's first week as a farm hand..

It was Friday and Billy Bob told Al we are partying tonight!

Billy Bob: There's gonna be a lot of fightin!

Al: I love me a rumble!

Billy Bob: there's gonna be some boozing!

Al: I love me some whiskey!

Billy Bob: There's gonna be some F$&king!

Al: I'm lo...

An Irishman drinks at the pub until they close.

An Irishman drinks at the pub until they close.

He stands up to leave and falls flat on his face. He tries to stand one more time and falls again. He figures he'll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up.

Outside, he tries to stand up and falls flat again....

4 MBA students.

4 MBA students went out on a night before their exam and were boozing hard. They did not study for the test and thought of a plan to escape. So they went to their dean looking weary and worn out, their dresses covered in grease and dirt.

They told their dean that they had all gone to a weddin...

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