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Blog Jokes

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What's the difference between a fitness blog and a porn site?

One's all about proteins, whilst the other is more about amateur teens

I started blogging by writing about all the best this about cats.

It was my cat-A-list.

I'm going to start a blog for irrational numbers...

I think I'll call it the 3.1 forums...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My child-free blog is attracting a ton of pedophiles.

It's called "Fuck Kids".

What's the difference between a joke and your friend's blog?

You enjoy it when a joke is posted on Facebook

A newly published novelist wrote in her blog that her 100,000-word thriller got her $1,000,000 from her publisher.

She brags at a party that her words are worth $10 each. A slightly drunk guy walks up, confronts her by the bar, plots down $10 and says “OK, wise ass, give me one of those $10 words.” The writer calmly stuffs the bill in her pocket and says “thanks” and walks away.

Ah, Perry the Platypus. Before I begin, I would like to assure you that this joke was absolutely not stolen. And of course by not stolen I mean COMPLETELY STOLEN! *activates trap*

Behold, My voice-changenator! This masterpiece has the power to modify people's voices across the tristate area! Watch as I merely post to my blog, and then any one who reads it is suddenly unable to resist even thinking in a voice other than my own!

TIL wooden shoe failure is responsible for multiple deaths each year in the Netherlands. The incidents are archived on this government website.

The Broken Clog Croakin' Blog

I went to a bookstore the other day ...

After wandering around for a while, an employee in a colored apron approached me.

"Can I help you find anything, sir?"

"Oh, yes. Sure. I'm looking for a book about turtles."

"Hardback?" she inquired.

"Yep, and little heads."

---

Retelling of a joke by Mark ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Excuse me -are you a psychic hooker?

**cuz you just blew my mind.**


*full credit: gavin mcginnes via streetboners blog from about 5 years ago.*

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Merry Xmas in advance. Kind Of

Father of all non veg:

A family was at the dinner table.

Son asked his father---' Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there??

Surprised father answered- 'Well, son, there are three kinds of boobs:? In her 20's, a woman's are like melons, round and firm.?

In her 30's to 40's,...

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I was offered sex today by a 36 year old lady

In exchange of that, I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner on my blog. Of course i declined because of my morals and strong will power. which is just as strong as ajox. the super strong bathroom cleaner. now available scented with lemon or vanilla.

What is the difference between a tube and a foolish Dutchman?

One is a hollow cylinder and the other a silly Hollander.


Source (Cause I can't claim fame for Victorian era jokes): http://www.historytoday.com/blog/2011/10/victorian-jokes-best-19th-century-humour

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Gambling jokes

**Husband**: How do you lose $150 in the slot machines!

**Wife**: You lost $15000 at the tables!

**Husband**: Yeah but I know how to gamble.

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**Bettor**: My god, I had a terrible day today. I lost 15 ou...

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