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Tumblr Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I think Tumblr banning porn has already backfired

Now more of their users are getting off than ever.

Why is Tumblr so unhealthy?

It's full of trans fats.

What does Tumblr and KFC's chicken have in common?

They both contain high amounts of trans fats.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Whether you're a Redditor, a 4channer or a Tumblr...

We can all come together on PornHub

So I saw that Princess Diana is trending on tumblr.

She's all over the dashboard!

I was about to propose to my girlfriend

I was about to propose to my girlfriend when my roommate Joseph barged into the room out of nowhere, tripped, and fell over, breaking a glass table with his face. Totally ruined the mood. Now I don't know Joseph THAT well, don't even remember where he was from, but let's say I put my plans on hold t...

Why isn't Tumblr considered social media?

Because everyone on there is just talking to themselves.

Why is Tumblr so odd?

Because they can't even.

My doctor advised me to stay away from trans fats.

I guess I should really get off Tumblr

why cant Paul Walker use tumblr?

He only sticks to the dashboard

Tumblr is like junk food

They're both filled with trans fat.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Tumblr is using a special program just to remove any images of anal sex

It's a debugger

What do you call a dinner with someone you met in tumblr?

FedEx

Where do Tumblr users go to pray?

The Cis-Teen Chapel

Tumblr told a lot of their users to go screw themselves

Just not on their site.

Why aren't Tumblr users good farm contractors?

Because they always take a fence

What do you call it when a school is made for Tumblr teens?

Edgy-cation....



I’m sorry

What's the difference between Donald Trump and tumblr

One's a moronic waste of space with no understanding of how the American political system works, and a borderline fetishistic hatred of Hillary Clinton. The other is Donald Trump

What kind of computer does the Tumblr servers run on?

Not a binary one, thats for sure.

It makes sense that tumblr is against whites with dreadlocks

After all, these are the *dreaded* white people they're always talking about.

What did the tumblr user do when she got arthritis?

Massage a knee.

Many of my tumblr friends identify as otherkin. Be it wolfkin, eaglekin or yes even fantasykin. I myself identify as a jedi.

So I'm forcekin.

How many Tumblr women does it take to change a light bulb?

I WILL NOT BE A VICTIM!

My dad and i were driving past a cemetery

When suddenly my dad said in a serious toned voice

"I know something you don't know about this place.The people living in this town aren't allowed to be buried in here"

And i was really confused so i asked why and he said

"Because they are still alive."

Original: tumblr u...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Apparently some people on Tumblr say they're sexually attracted to elements on the periodic table.

That's not really my thing ... except for that time in college when I experimented with carbon dating.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were going camping.

They pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night, Holmes woke up Watson and said, "look up, and tell me what you see."

Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars."

Holmes asked, "And what do you deduce from that?"

Wats...

Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson were going camping.

They set up their tent, started a campfire, and laid down their sleeping bags inside of the tent. After a few hours of playing cards and joking by the fire, they extinguished the fire and went to sleep. Holmes awoke Watson in the middle of the night and they looked up at the starry night sky.
...

What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs?

A condescending con descending!


(This has been my favorite joke for years, so I thought I’d share! :) Pretty sure I originally saw if from a tumblr post, it’s not my original joke)

Q: Why don't robots have brothers?

A: Because they all have trans-sisters.


^^^thanks ^^^tumblr

What did the pirate say when he turned 80?

Aye matey



(As seen on Tumblr)

What do you call a crying glass of wine?

Tumblr

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Person A : "Windows 8 can suck my dick" Person B : "I can't believe how far technology has come today"

found on tumblr

As per the doctor's recommendation, I have decided to rid my diet of trans fat.

Goodbye Tumblr!

Are tectonic plates dishwasher safe?

IDK but they're perfect for a continental breakfast.

- that's some faulty humour -




Source:
http://lustyyouth.tumblr.com/post/119359329507/affectionateghostie-maddoraptor-edwrad

my doctor told me to eat more taco bell

well actually he said “less mcdonalds” but i’m pretty sure i know what he meant




src: tumblr

A friend once told me...

There's this article on tumblr that i suggest you read. Its about the elections!
I politely refused and said:"no thank you, i already reddit."


Please forgive me.

Favorite Mythological Creature

Someone on tumblr who isn't oppressed

What is Kanye West's favourite kind of omelette?

Omeletteyoufinish


-stolen from raininginreverse on tumblr.

What dries your clothes but can also make you writhe around in agony?

A tumblr.

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