14 Jokes

are πrates.

Fat. You get fat.



You were expecting a joke about pi? On my cake day?

Diabetes.

What?, did you really think I was gonna make a pie joke on my cake day?

^btw ^I ^waited ^1 ^whole ^year ^to ^tell ^this ^joke

Can you please stop calling my new phone?

A πthon

One day, two young brothers in Rome, aged 12 and 14, came home with a 20 and 50 euro note. Their mother asked them where they got all that money from.

"Well, we were standing outside the brothel when a guy left," said the 12-year-old. "We told him that we knew where he had been, so he asked u... read more

She got a standing ovulation

Forgetting to grab your shopping bag at the grocery store counter.......spiceless

To cope with this news, I bought a puppy.

I replied, "That's 15 love."

He suffered some minor injuries but he decided to pretend to be in a coma for rest of his sentence.

When he finally decided to drop the act on the last day of his sentence, the warden arrested him again, because you aren't supposed to end a sentence with a coma.

Must be big love, haven't seen her for weeks.

Is just an onion...
DEEP

The student was so happy and she showed it to her mom as soon as she reached home.

However, the mom feels mildly disturbed as she thought the 14/10 didn’t make any sense. “14 out of 10? The teacher was just randomly writing the grade, so irresponsible”, she thought like this and the next day ... read more

" One little boy says, "None, the shotgun scared them all away." Teacher says, "That's not the answer I was looking for, but I like the way you're thinking." Boy says to teacher, "I have a question for you." "There's 3 women eating ice cream cones. 1 is licking, 1 is sucking, 1 is biting. Which on... read more

Dr. Strange

Mr. President.

Why doesn't he move away?

...are πlots.

An American lawyer thinks this is a great opportunity to earn $100 and goes to the clinic.

Lawyer: "I have lost my sense of taste."

Chinese: "Nurse, bring medicine from box No. 14 and put 3 drops in patient's mouth."

Lawyer: "Ugh. this is kerosene."

Chinese: "Congrats, yo... read more

Having a baby!

Happy Mother's Day!

Does anyone want to buy 14 lions?

In my defense it was doggy style so it's more like 14 minutes.

Easy! Slice of pi.

I mowed the town cemetery.

She asked me, what just happened to which i replied “cream π” .

Dad: What? $15,554??? $14,354 is a lot of money! What do you need $16,782 for anyway?

And it only took me 14 years

It's 14.

Being pi-irate

Because if he chose SpaceY he’d land on 14 year old boys.

It was a 14 year olds birthday and his family was very poor, and could only afford one gift for him. His father wanted to get him a new toy to play with, his mother wanted to get him new clothes, so they decided to compromise and get him coveralls with the pockets cut out.


(My grandpa tol... read more

Cause I pi-rated it.

Yep that’s it. It’s going to price out all those apps you all use instead of the official one to read or post jokes. And I can tell you first hand, it is much tougher to copy and paste in official app.

Can we go black out on June 12-14?

It was pirated.

Oh and “blind” was a verb

Me: "yes, as a matter of fact I am"
Interviewer: "Whats 14x27"
Me: "49"
Interviewer: "that's not even close"
me: "yeah, but it was fast"

With a Blender.

How do you get them out?

With Nachos.

The authors said the problem is tumbling out of control.

Just wait. They'll tell you.

Virus has been quarantined for 14 days

"I have nothing to wear!"

I told her "why bother? You'll be 14 in a few years anyway"

A businessman was confused about a bill he had received, so he asked his secretary for some mathematical help.

"If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?" he asked her.

The secretary replied, "Everything but my earrings."

Then he asked me what street I grew up on.

This morning he even asked where I met his mom and what was the name of my first pet! ❤❤❤❤❤

I had to do another 7 days because they were too weak.

Don’t ever google tips for grooming a teenage girl. I’m now on a list somewhere….

2.718

So she created a bong out of a pineapple and paper towel tube. She didn't have any cool friends with real drugs so she tried to smoke oregano, but found it hurt her throat. Next she tried black pepper in the bong but it made her sneeze. She experimented with ground Ginger but the smoke made her eyes... read more

On a scale of 1-10, I'd give a 3.14

Pioneering work, I think you'll agree.

Halfway into the flight, the pilots announce that the plane is going down, and that there are only three parachutes on board.

Lionel Messi grabs a parachute and says “Well guys, I’m the best football player in the world. My fans and millions of people worldwide need me!”, and jumps out of th... read more

13 to go in reverse and 1 to go in forward in-case the enemy attacks from behind.

Unrelatedly, I’ve been fired from my job as a bus driver.

Because you're basic asf.

Q. who was the Jewish prophet that led the water molecules across the partially permeable membrane?
A. osmoses

One pi

-"Every time I say something, you say the word addicted"

-"ok"

-"Drugs"

-"Addicted"

-"Alcohol"

-"Addicted"

-"What slapped you across the face last night? "

" Addicted"

They both realized that they needed to see a marriage counselor. They found one that some friends said had helped them immensely. He invited them in and asked them what was going on. The husband just looked down, not knowing what to say, but the wife talked for 15 minutes straight, laying out issue ... read more