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Weeds Jokes

what should you do if you're addicted to sea weed

Sea kelp

The Caribbean is under attack from invasive plant life and other weeds

The situation is dire, specifically the Cuban Thistle Crisis

A developer tried to pull weeds out of his garden...

...but he didn't have root access.

I tried using Roundup on the 7 weeds in our backyard.

Now we have 10 weeds.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What has happened when the weeds take over your lawn?

A coup de grass.

Grandma was outside pulling weeds...

....... on a hot summer day when her grandpa walked up and asked her what they were having for dinner. Irritated by the thought of him sitting in the air conditioned house while she labored away on the weeds, she snapped, "I can't believe you're asking me about supper right now! Pretend I'm out of t...

A bloke starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks…

First is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds. As he does this a huge fish jumps out and bites him. To show who is boss, he beats it to death with a spade. Realising his employer won't be best pleased he disposes of the fish by feeding it to the lions, as lions will eat anything.

Moving ...

Grandma took my weed

so I took her wheelchair neither of us rolling.

Give weeds an inch…

And they’ll take a yard.

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