UPJOKE
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Why don't snakes like Vitamin C?

Because it's an anti-hisstamine.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do Japanese monsters drink for vitamin C?

Kai-Juice!


(My mom came up with that one.)

I have found that I have been happier since I switched from coffee to orange juice.

My Dr. explained that it’s the vitamin C and natural sugars but I really think it’s the vodka.

What’s the difference between Vitamin C and your mother’s sister wetting her pants?

One's an antioxidant and the other's an auntie accident.

I told my roommate you get enough vitamin C in your diet without needing supplements.

The next morning, I noticed he was still taking Vitamin C with breakfast.

"Why are you taking that?" I quizzed him.

"What do you mean?" was his response. Feeling the need to revisit our previous discussion, I reminded him,

"It's fruitless".

Yesterday I saw a marine mammal swim along the coast holding a glass of orange juice in it's flippers.

Turned out to be a Vitamin C-lion

What’s the best way to cure blindness?

Vitamin C

It’s the cold and flu time of year

Or as I like to call it, Vitamin C-son.

Three pregnant women were knitting tops for their soon-to-be born.

One posh one says "I'm taking vitamin A, as I want my baby to have strong bones and teeth". The other posh one says "I'm taking vitamin C, as I want my baby to have a good constitution and good heart". The chavvy one says "I'm taking Thalidomide cos I can't knit arms".

What do you call a vitamin that improves your eyesight?

Vitamin c.

Three pregnant women are sitting in a doctors.

Three pregnant women are sitting in a doctors waiting room knitting. Mom 1 checks her watch and takes a pill "Vitamin C, good for mom, good for baby." Mom 2 takes a pill and says, "Vitamin A, good for mom, good for baby." Mom 3 takes a pill and says, "Thalidomide...I can't knit sleeves."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In hard times, a young woman turns to prostitution...

For obvious reasons, she tries to keep this hidden from her only relative, her old grandma.

One cold evening, the brothel that the prostitute works in is raided by police. All sex workers are forced to wait in a line outside to show identification and documents.

As luck would have it, ...

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