Very Sensitive Jokes - 21 Hilarious Very Sensitive Jokes

Three guys go in for a job interview.

The first guy goes in and kicks , best job interview he’s ever done in his life. End of the interview comes around, the interviewer says:

“By the way, do you notice anything strange about me?”

“Yeah,” says the guy… “You don’t have any EARS, man!”

“I’m sorry, says the intervie...

I'm very sensitive to sounds of a certain frequency.

When I hear them it hertz.

"This is the hardest part of our job," said the police officer after Adam was pronounced dead in the accident.

"Yeah, but break the news slowly. His wife is a very sensitive person."

The police officer knocks on the door and Adam's wife opens it.

"Are you Adam's widow?" said the police.

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A Visit to the Tailor (Slightly )

A man starts getting chronic headaches and his testicles swell and become very sensitive. The doctor informs him that his testicles must be amputated or he risks death. The guy reluctantly agrees and the operation is performed. Several days later he comes in for a follow-up. He gets a clean bill of ...

A young Army officer was severely wounded in the head by a grenade

, but the only visible, permanent injury was that both of his ears were amputated.

Since his remaining hearing was sufficient, he remained in the Army. Many years later he eventually rose to the rank of Major General.

He was, however, very sensitive about his appearance. One day the G...

Beware of certain doctors

I went to the doctor to have blood drawn and he bit my neck and now I am very sensitive to daylight and I have suddenly become very thirsty at night.

Whatever you do, avoid Dr. Acula!

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A young executive is leaving the office late one evening, when he finds the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.

"Listen," says the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document here, and my secretary has gone for the night. Can you make this thing work for me?"

"Sure," the young executive says.

He turns the machine on, inserts the paper, and presses the start button.

"Excellent, e...

A sensitive man...

Some construction workers are working on a high building early in the morning.

Sadly, Steve slips off a ledge, spirals down to the ground and is critically injured.

They attempt to save him with CPR, but there is a large hole in his skull that the blood keeps squirting out of, and he...

So this city blonde goes to a barn

She asks the farmer: “Excuse me, why does that cow have no horns?”.

The farmer, being quite the expert on the matter, explained to her with great detail:

“Well m’am, there’s many reasons why some cows don’t have horns. Some breeds don’t have horns. For example: Angus cows don’t have ...

A guy walks into a bar.

"I'd like a Scotch on the rocks ... hold the ice. I have very sensitive teeth," the guy tells the bartender. "In fact, they're probably upset right now that I told you that."

Never disappear.

They're very sensitive fruits.

Why were the classified documents crying?

They had very sensitive information.

Have you heard of the new republican themed condom that is taking off?

It's extremely thin skinned and very sensitive

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A man is at a job interview. The interviewer asks: What would you say is your greatest strength?

" I'm very sensitive".
And what would you say is your greatest weakness?
" Honesty"
I don't think honesty is a weakness!?
"I don't give a what you think"

I made my girlfriend cry the other day.

I called her son a disappointment. Apparently she's very sensitive about her miscarriage.

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Martha had terrible acne and had very little luck getting dates.

She was so glad when Bill started taking an interest in her. She didn’t mind at all that Bill had a fake wooden eye that looked off in odd directions when he spoke. She was just happy to have a man finally take an interest in her despite her terrible acne problem.

For his part, Bill was ve...

A company develops a machine for evaluating IQ.

The scientists developing it asks for the help of the supervisor, manager and president of the firm to test the machine.

When the supervisor places his head on the machine, it responded: 'IQ 160', and he was very impressed.

When the manager places his head on the machine, it re...

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An Italian guy, a Russian guy, and a Polish guy are waiting for a job interview.

An Italian guy, a Russian guy, and a Polish guy are sitting in a waiting room, waiting to be called in for a job interview.

The Italian is called into the manager's office first.

The manager is a nice looking, normal guy, but he has no ears. The Italian takes a seat.

"For this ...

An old man goes to see a doctor.

He says, "Doctor, my wife is having some hearing problems. Whenever I speak to her, half the time she doesn't respond to me. But I can't bring her here for checkup, as she is very sensitive about her old age, and might freak out."

Doctor says, "Alright, but I will need to know from how much d...

A Wife goes to her husband for help

She asks him what she needs to do to inform her very sensitive niece that she is getting fat without hurting her feelings. So the husband says we should go to the store and get a talking scale so that it can inform her on how big she is getting without out it coming from her. So they go to the store...

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Did you hear about the CEO with no ears?

There was a CEO with no ears and he was hiring new employees, the interviews went a little like this:

The first interview went fine for the most part but then came the last question.

CEO: Alright, the jobs requirement is to be very keen to detail. Tell me, what is something you...

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