Customer service vents

Sorry, but I need to vent!!!!
I experienced the WORST customer service at a store today, I don't want to mention the name of the place yet because I'm not sure how I'm going to proceed. Last night I bought something from there, I paid cash for it. I took it home and found out it didn't work. So t...

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Zack late to his work

Zach's boss was super pissed as Zack was an hour late to the work because of the daylight savings time.

After the boss left, Zack kick a lamp to vent out his frustration.

Suddenly a genie appeared and said - you have made me free. I will grant you a wish.

Zack - Can you bring pe...

A smart man and a not so smart man are locked in a room

A smart man and a not so smart man are locked in a room. One day they decided they didn’t like being locked up anymore, and wanted to escape. The not so smart one has to rely on the smart one to get out. So they made their way up to the roof through a series of vents. Once up on the roof of the buil...

Death and Gravity are having coffee together.

Death is complaining to Gravity after a long hard week. He tells Gravity " Man, I am so sick of my job. EVERYBODY hates, nobody is ever glad to see me. I just can't take it anymore"

Gravity listens sympathetically to Death venting and replies "Dude, I know just how you feel. I'm always bringi...

I asked Peter Pan how Captain Hook would vent his frustration.

"Beat Smee," he replied.

"Oh, sorry." I said. "I thought you'd know."

Why do Amoung Us characters bottle up their emotions?

Because they get kicked out of the group when they vent.

I find that corn fields are the best places to vent your frustrations...

...because they're all ears.

Why was the Imposter so frustrated?

He just needed to vent

(among us reference) you know what your dad and red had in common.

both of them escaped through the vents

Why does Darth Vader's breathing sound so angry?

He is just venting...

Why are Germans bad at Among Us?

Because they vent here and vent there.

Hisssss, whooooosssh, whirrrr, pffffffff, ssssstttsssttssss, hssssssss,phoooofooofoof, sllllllslslslllslsl..........

Sorry, just venting.

A man in Shanghai named Sam wakes up one morning to find...

A man in Shanghai named Sam wakes up one morning to find that his car, a Mustang, has had all the internal components removed, leaving only a hollow, useless shell. He calls the police and soon an investigative team arrives.


The lead investigator approaches the victim and says "It appear...

One day a man decided to retire... He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank.

He soon found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts.

After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore.

In disbelief, he asks, "Where did you come from? How...

A Blonde wife walks in to her living room and finds her blonde husband desperately looking for something.

He's moving furniture, checking in vents, simply looking in every nook and cranny of the living room. Perplexed the wife asks him what he is searching for.
"Hidden Cameras," the husband replies.
"Why!?" The wife asks totally boggled.
"Because the man on the tv knows what I'm doing. Every...

We went for a hike at the weekend , despite the blustery conditions , and despite taking 2 steps forward then 3 steps back we battled against the weather quite well.

Then it happened, from nowhere came down the sandwiches, sausage rolls, scotch eggs quiche and Vol-au-vent and then I realised we was being buffetted by the wind.

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Young naive couple

A young naïve newlywed couple from rural China decided to move to America to start a new life with nothing but big dreams and the love for each other. They arrived at their new home in rural Minnesota, and although they were happy and still in love, the first couple of months were difficult. They ...

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A woman bent down

....to take a close look at a fine piece of jewelry in a jewelry store. In the process she vent out a fart. Embarrassed at that she looked around to see if anyone heard that.
A salesman was right behind her. She gathered her composure and in the hope he didn't notice her breaking the win...

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Coronavirus Pandemic, day 16

If anyone is still out there, I’m alive but struggling. Food is running low. Down to only 459 days worth. My hands are super sanitized and my butt is super clean. Down to 1599 rounds of ammo (dropped 1 round down the heat vent while doing daily inventory). Power still on, but for how long? Missing h...

Vat Da Heck, Ole ?

Ole's car was hit by a truck in an accident. In court, the trucking company's lawyer was questioning Ole.

'Didn't you say, sir, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine, ?' asked the lawyer.

Ole responded, 'Vell, I'll tell you vat happened. I had yust loaded my favorite mule, Bessie, in...

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So there's this duck...

...and one day he's walkin down the street when he gets a huge craving for some donuts. So he goes to the bakery and walks in and says to the baker "hey man can i get a dozen donuts, half glazed and half boston creme?" And the baker's like "No, you can't. We don't serve ducks here." And the duck's a...

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A wise man once said,

Nothing. He let her vent and then they had sex afterwards.

The Zoo Joke (Long)

So there's this zoo, and this zoo isn't very affluent, but, if someone visits the zoo, it is definitely to see their gorilla.

One morning, the workers come in early to open the zoo like normal and find, to their great sadness, that their famous gorilla has died of old age. The zoo staff are ...

A guy lost his dog

The guy takes the dead dog to the vet to get the vet's opinion. The vet said the dog is dead. The owner didn't want to admit his dog is dead and asked for a 2nd opinion. The vet gets a cat. It sniffs the dead dog and says "meow". That was the 2nd opinion which was the dog is dead. The guy wanted a 3...

R.I.P Bob

Bob was a bus conductor-cum-driver. He had been going through rough times, with his wife leaving him for his best friend. One day on the job, he saw a young woman, probably in her early 20's signalling for the bus. Bob couldn't hold his rage in anymore and vented his frustration on the pedal, killin...

Which is the angriest machine ever?

the venting machine...

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An older couple were exploring art museum...

...when they came across a painting that they didn't quite understand. It appeared to be three naked black men sitting on a bench, the one in the middle had a white penis. This made the couple ponder for a while.

What was the message? Was it a commentary on racism? Perhaps an insight into cla...

What do you call it when a person sees a Christmas-themed commercial and then goes on a rant about the over-commercialization of the holiday?

An Ad Vent!

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A customs agent stopped Sam, an elderly Jewish man who had just immigrated to Israel and asked him to open his two suitcases.

In the first suitcase, the agent found over 1 million pounds in £10 notes. "Excuse me, sir" he asked Sam, "where did you get all this money?"
"Vell, I'll tell you," Sam began, "I love Israel. For many years I travelled all around the world and stopped off at all of the public toilets in all the ...

I was wondering why my computer was getting so hot.

I guess it just needed to vent.

A guy walks into a bar with a dog under his arm...

...he announces to everyone in the bar that his dog can talk and he will make a $1000 bet with anyone who doesn't believe him. The bartender saw this as a great opportunity so he took the man up on the wager.

The man looks at the dog and says, "What is the top of a house called?" The dog sa...

After 37 years of marriage. Jake dumped his wife for his Young secretary.

His new girlfriend demanded that they live in Jake and Edith’s multi million dollar home and since the man’s lawyers were a little better he prevailed.

He gave Edith his now ex-wife just 3 days to move out. She spent the 1st day packing her belongings into boxes crates and suitcases.

O...

Why was the fan a hot mess?

Because it felt trapped and needed somewhere to vent.

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A man finds out his wife is cheating on him...

... So he goes to the golf course to blow off some steam and meets a fellow golfer. After a couple rounds he starts to vent to him about his situation.

When the man finishes his story, the new found friend reveals that he is a hit man and charges $1000 bucks per kill. The man contemplates thi...

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The municipal philharmonic symphony and chorus were rehearsing....

The municipal philharmonic symphony and
chorus were rehearsing Symphony No. 9 by Ludwig Von Beethoven. Since
the chorus doesn't enter until the final movement, the singers were
becoming very bored - especially the men in the back row. Then the
basses had a clever idea. During break, th...

the knights

What is the name of the knight who moonlights as a geologist?

Sir Vey

What is the name of the agreeable knight?

Sir Tenly

What is the name of the Knight who used to be a slave?

Sir Vent

What are the names of the Knights who run the graduation ceremony?
...

An illustrious Count, Wictor Oblodowsky, agrees to conduct Beethoven's 9th Symphony in a Baltimore gym.

He's hesitant at first. He'd only been to America once before, and it was a favor for a friend. The oboist in his orchestra kindly loaned him the first season of The Wire, but the Count never watched it, as he'd never gotten around to buying a DVD player.

After an uneventful flight and some t...

A man hears his doorbell ring

He goes to open the door, but sees no one there. He glances down, thinking maybe it was a package dropped off, but only sees his doormat and a snail on the ground. Realizing it must have been immature kids ding-dong ditching, he becomes a little angry. To vent his frustration, he picks up the snail ...

A woman in a store was complaining vehemently about her bathroom fan.

I guess she really needed to vent.

Why is eavesdropping at the Oval Office like watching Sister Act?

Either way, you're gonna hear a con-vent.

I just got a job cleaning air ducts and I don't like it very much, but at least I have a job.

Thanks for letting me vent.

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Man Gets Biggest Shock Ever After Eating A Hot Chilli. This Is Insane 💕

I went grocery shopping recently while not being altogether sure that said course of action was a wise one. You see, the previous evening I had prepared and consumed a massive quantity of my patented 'Killer Chili'. Tasty stuff, albeit hot to the point of being painful, which comes with a written gu...

Une blague en Français - For french people only

Une femme avoue à son mari qu'elle a un fantasme depuis plusieurs années de faire l'amour pendant qu'un grand noir leur fait du vent avec une feuille de palmier.

Après y avoir bien réfléchi, le mari décide de demander à son collègue de l'aider.

Le lendemain, ils sont donc tous les 3 (l...

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