What do you call a deep fissure that says one thing but means the opposite?

A sarchasm

What did one geologist say to the other while they both stared down at a giant fissure in the rocks?

“I wonder whose fault this is.”

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2 Anal Fissures walk into a bar

One asks “could you pass a stool please?”

The other replies “OK...but it’s going to hurt...”
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[OC] Did you hear the one about the douchebag bodybuilder with the anal fissure?

He's one ripped asshole.

What do you call a Klingon who is best friends with an expert in spacetime cracks?

A fissure-man's Worf.

Ruth went to her doctor for a check up

The doctor told her, "You have a fissure in your uterus, and if you ever have a baby it would be a miracle."

When she arrived home, Ruth told her husband "You vouldn't belief it. I vent to the doctah and he said to me 'You haf a fish in your uterus and if you haf a baby it vill be a mackerel....

My friend falls into and makes canyons for a living

He's a fissure man

What was George Gershwin's favorite winter sport?

Fissure jumping.

(and the cotton is high)

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