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Trojan Jokes

Why Trojans are a terrible brand name

Trojans are a terrible name for a brand of condoms. Here's why: when you think of Trojans you think of the Trojan Horse. What's the Trojan Horse do? It sneaks past your defenses, then in the middle of the night it breaks open and a whole bunch of little dudes come spilling out of it. That's exactly ...

I think Trojan is a bad name for a condom brand...

...because of course, the Trojans were a people whose lives were ruined when a vessel containing little warriors unexpectedly exploded inside their city walls...

Trojan just had to fire several employees.

Too many people were late.

why are they called trojan condoms?

because when they break a bunch of men come out

My girlfriend and I were shopping today. We saw that Trojan had designed Olympic sponsored Condoms? I told here we had to buy some...

What's so special about them?

They have 3 colors: Gold, Silver and Bronze.

And what color are you going to wear tonight?

Gold, obviously!

Why not Silver? It'd be great if you could come second for a change.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Masturbating into condoms...

Jack is dating this girl Paula. He takes her out five times before he finally gets her back up to his apartment for coffee. They're fooling around on the couch, they move to the bedroom, and they have sex.

After it's done, Paula glances over at the nightstand and sees the box of Trojans. It'...

What’s it called when a woman pokes a hole in a condom?

A Trojan horse

I asked my dad, “Why did you give me the name Achilles?”

He said, “Because you broke through the Trojan wall.”

I saw all the people complaining about inappropriate YouTube ads, and at first I thought they were kidding. Then I saw a Trojan condoms ad.

I thought they were horsing around.

What do you call a balloon animal made out of a condom?

A Trojan horse.

“Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.”

- Trojan wall guards, probably.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A young woman is ready for her first mission in the US Navy.

She sits down across the Lieutenant's desk, ready to be assigned. "You will be serving on the USS Trojan," the Lieutenant says, "A state-of-the-art Submarine erected in 2003, and has never been in the water."

"Never been in the water? Even after 17 years?" She asks, the Lieutenant nods.
...

Russian Condoms!

President Boris Yeltsin called Clinton with an emergency: "Our largest condom factory has exploded!" the Russian President cried; "my people's favorite form of birth control! This is a true disaster!" "Boris, the American people would be happy to do anything within their power to help you," replied ...

Customer complaints

A 20 something gentleman is at the airport and tries to buy a 15 tickets. She looks behind the man to see 14 children behind him. She asks if they were all his. He says no that he works for Trojan and they were all customer complaints.

Have you ever heard of the Greek hero Bophades?

He was one of the heroes who fought in the Trojan War. His story is similar to the story of Achilles. When he was a child, his mother held him by the groin and dipped him in the river Styx, as to make him invincible in battle. However, just like Achilles, he had a weak spot. Because his mother held ...

If someone sends you a link to download the Homer's Iliad, don't download it...

It's full of trojans!!

Hey Girl, are you a newly opened e-mail account?

Cos I wanna spam up you inbox so hard I leave a trojan inside you.

A man is in court

(Long but worth it)

Judge: "You are accused of beating your wife to death. If you want to expect any mercy, you'll have to give us a damn good reason."
Man: "She was so stupid, I just had to kill her."
Judge: "That is even worse. If you don't want to be declared guilty on the spot, you ...

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