The big bad wolf converted to Buddhism and there was finally peace in the forest. But suddenly, the air was filled with screams of terror! A bear asked the animals running past him, "What's happening now?" A goat shouted, "The big bad wolf is meditating!"
"So? Isn't that a good thing?" questioned the bear.
"Noooo!" the goat bleated. "It's become aware wolf!"
I would post a joke about Buddhism
But I don’t have enough karma
I was trying to write a joke about Buddhism
But nothing came to mind.
Who do you get when you cross a Tibetan Buddhism spiritual leader with a Jewish spiritual leader?
Buddhism is opposed to our always-on, technologically driven lives.
It’s not the emails that are the problem. It’s the attachments.
A man's broken fence
A man's fence is broken and he neess to hire someone to fix it.
So he goes online to find someone to fix his fence for him but he is unsatisfied with their prices, that is until he finds a Buddhist monk who will do it for free.
He is initially surprised by this and assumes it might be...
In Buddhism, people first die, then they attain Nirvana.
..Kurt Cobain did it the other way round.
How do you prove that Buddhism is the best religion?
Using the Dalai Lemma
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Three Japanese men die in a horrible bus accident and go to the gates of heaven. St. Peter stops them at the gate, eyes them suspiciously and says "Boys, most Japanese practice Shinto or Buddhism. You're actually Christians?"
The three indignantly protest that they were raised in Christian families and have practiced the religion their entire lives. St. Peter says: "Ok, I'm going to ask you one question. If you get the one question correct, you will get to go into heaven." Excited about not going to hell, the three Japan...
What is relationship of Buddhism and reposts. ?
When someone starts a joke with Buddhism it will end up with reposts.
Did you hear about the spread of Buddhism to China?
There was mass Confucian.
What is Buddhism measured in?
What’s similar between Buddhism and Reddit?
Both have a goal of collecting the most karma.
What did the email account do when it started practicing Buddhism?
It let go of all attachments.
I had no complaints....
I had no complaints when i became interested in Buddhism and became a Budist
a few more when i became invested in affirmative action and became an activist
but as soon as i got into fashion....
Mind, Body and Spirit wal into a bar (repost from /r/Buddhism)
Mind says, "I'll have a beer please."
Body says, "I'll have a beer please."
Spirit says, "I'll have a beer please."
So the bartender serves one beer.
One guy goes to India and visits a monastery
He saw some old monks meditating around the garden but was perplexed not to see any young monks around. "Is Buddhism dying?", he thought. Right after that, he sees a young monk entering a building with some bags of flour and sugar and decides to follow him.
What he found was stunning. On one...
A Buddhist monk leaves his monastery after 10 years
His fellow monks beg him not to leave, but he firmly tells them that he is leaving to begin spreading his new form of Buddhism. After a few months, the leader of the monastery happens to bump into him, and tries to convince him to come back. The monk, again, firmly says that he has already begun spr...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Some Religious Truths
TAOISM: Shit happens
ZEN BUDDHISM: What is the sound of shit happening?
PROTESTANTISM: Let shit happen to someone else
ATHEISTS: Shit happens for no apparent reason
HARE KRISHNA: Shit happens/ Shit happens/ Happens, happens/ Shit happens
CONFUCIANISM: Confucius say...
A preist, a monk, and a rabbi are sitting on a boat...
The monk says "oh right I forgot something back at the dock" and then proceeds to run across the water to the dock and back. The priest is astonished at the powers of Buddhism and the rabbi simply nods. hours later the rabbi needs to use the restroom and proceeds to follow in the monks suit running ...
Sad Old Man
There once was an old man. During his life, he had started his own tech company, married a beautiful woman and had two children who moved on to be successful mechanical engineers. He also vehemently argued against Christianity, Buddhism and Islam and proclaimed that the only reasonable religious vie...
A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Sikh." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."
Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. "Religion?" "Buddhism." “Go to room 18, but be very quiet ...
After years of going to catholic church I’ve finally decided to seek other points of view on religion...
... After countless hours of study and understanding, I felt an uneasy feeling in my stomach.
Had I made a mistake? Had I crossed a benevolent God?
I had studied Judaism in Israel,
Buddhism in Tibet,
Even to indigenous areas of the globe to to better understand what it...
I've Studied Various Religions
And here's what I found:
* Christianity was too cross.
* Islam kept dropping bombs on me.
* Buddhism kept repeating itself.
* Hinduism made me have a cow.
* and Judaism made my hair curl.
The Police Officer fronted the press conference...
“A major incident happened at the Goodsprings Buddhism and Yoga Retreat this morning. To put it frankly, it was a bloodbath,” explained the Commissioner.
A sea of hands go up from the journalists.
“When did this happen, and why?” asked the first.
The Commission replied “Pr...