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Taunted Jokes

What's the difference between Antony Hopkins' character in Silence of the Lambs and someone who taunted Jeffery Dahmer as he ate?

One's Hannibal Lechter and the other's a cannibal heckler.

"What did you think of my new Fibonacci joke?" the man asked.

"It was as bad as your previous two Fibonacci jokes combined," she taunted.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Jewish rope merchant from New York was trying desperately to sell some of his goods in Louisiana. But wherever he went, he kept encountering Anti-Semitism.

In one particular department store, the buyer taunted him:

“All right, Jew. I’ll buy some of your rope. As much as reaches from the top of your big Jewish nose to the tip of your little Jewish penis.”

Two weeks later, the buyer was startled to receive a shipment containing ten thousand...

Pablo Escobar gets his comeuppance

Back when Pablo Escobar was still a small time crook, he was known for peddling his product in the shady street corners of his home town.

One day during said nefarious activities, a bunch of local children rode by on their bikes and recognized his face. They promptly reported the heinous crim...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man inherited a massive sum of money from his great aunt, but it came with a catch...

As part of the terms of the inheritance, he was required to care for her cherished grey parrot. The executor told him if anything should happen to the bird, or if he ever chose not to take care of it, he would have to forfeit the inheritance and estate.

At first, this seemed simple enough, bu...

John went to the pub for some light drinking

He found a few old buddies and ended up drinking late into the night.

When he finally returned home at 3AM, he was expecting to be scolded, beaten and taunted by his wife. He was so drunk he passed out on the sofa.

The next morning he wakes up to find his wife humming tunes happily. Sh...

A surgeon, a farmer, an engineer, and a lawyer are arguing over whose career is the best.

"I think surgery is the best career because it's the oldest!" said the surgeon.

"What makes you say that?" asked the farmer.

"Well," said the surgeon, "God removed a rib from Adam and turned it into Eve."

"You are forgetting one thing," said the farmer. "Before God even created ...

A little story from WWII

A Russian patrol was going through the woods of Finland when they were wiped out, one by one, by a sniper hidden in the deep firs, who killed the lot, but for one man. "One Finn is better than ten Russians!" He was taunted as he ran away.


He returned to his base, and the platoon commande...

Swordplay on words

A fencer was sparring with his mentor. They had sparred many times before, but today, for some reason, the fencer just wasn't able to land a single hit.

"Ha!" the mentor taunted, "You'll never win if you keep using such obvious attacks!"

The fencer feinted.

There was once a thug who was in the scariest gang...

His original name was Con Dria, but soon he went by a different name in his gang. They called him Mighto, and he was the thug that did most of the crimes. From dealing drugs to robbing to Kidnapping. He did whatever was necessary to help out his gang.

However, after he accidentally ran over ...

Little Jimmy and Janey - primary school rivals, were having a game of one up-manship in the barn.

Jimmy did 20 pushups.... 'I bet you can't!' he shouted.

Janey then did 30.

Jimmy, annoyed, climbed to the highest point on the barn and jumped off, narrowly managing to land on a hay-bale that broke his fall.

'I bet you can't make that jump!' shouted Jimmy.

Janey proceede...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Little Johnny had a coffee can

The mailman saw Little Johnny sitting on the sidewalk with an old coffee can. He asked, "What do you have in that can there?"

Little Johnny replied, "Dog shit."

The mailman asked, "What are you going to do with a can full of dog shit?

Little Johnny answered, "I’m gonna make me a...

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