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My wife complains about constantly being sexually harassed at work

I told her she can stop working from home and go back to the office if she doesn’t like it

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If a man talks dirty to a woman, that's sexual harassment.

If a woman talks dirty to a man, that'll be $6.50 a minute.

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''Did you hear about the magician who was sued for sexual harassment? ''

''No. What was his name?''

''David Cop-a-feel.''

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A man goes to the police to report sexual harassment in the work place by a group of horny work colleagues.

He's a zoo keeper in the rhino enclosure.

A young Taiwanese boy asks his father a question:

(some things don't translate super well, I'll try my best)

He asks: "Dad, I heard some strange words at school today, and I don't know what they mean."

His dad responds, "Hmm... Tell me what they are. I'll try to explain them as best I can."

The boy asks the following: "What's '...

I lost my watch at a party once.

An hour later I saw some guy stepping on it while he was harassing some woman at that party. Infuriated, I immediately went over, punched him and broke his nose. No one does that to a woman, not on my watch

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An old man named Steve is walking down the street and sees a clown walking towards him.

"Hey look, a clown!" Steve says. "Do you think you could make me laugh?"

The clown says, "Not now, I'm tired. I want to go home."

"Oh come on!" says Steve. "Show me a magic trick you sissy! Make me feel young again!"

Steve won't quit harassing him, so the clown reluctantly agre...

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Everyone got up and cheered when Bob was fired for sexual harassment.

It was a touching farewell.

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My mother always told me I should treat people the way I want to be treated.

but every time I do, I get charged with sexual harassment.

Smells fishy to me. Not my work.

Two prawns were swimming around in the ocean.

One called Justin and the other called Kristian.

The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that inhabited the area:

Finally one day Justin said to Kristian. "I'm fed up with being a prawn. I wish I was a shar...

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Sexual harassment should not be joked about

It’s a very touchy subject to some people

What's the difference between harass and annoy?

I have never had my finger in annoy.

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Sex_al Harass_ _nt

All that's missing is "u" and "me".

Woman calls the cops to complain about a neighbour harassing her

The cop arrives at her apartment with a notebook in hand to take notes.
Cop: Yes Mam, tell me who’s this person and what are they doing ?

Woman: he lives in the flat one floor above and is constantly looking at me, when I’m in my bathroom. Such a creep.

Cop: ( a bit confused) can...

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A motorcycle officer stopped a man who ran a red light.

The guy was a real jerk, demanding, “Why am I being harassed by the Gestapo?!”
The officer calmly told him of his violation.
The man erupted in a tirade, questioning the officer’s ancestry and sexual orientation in explicit terms.
The officer took it in stride, saying nothing. When he finis...

An intern recently started working for an IT programming firm.

Everyday he went into work he was always harassed by his peers, they kept saying he was never being true always being false.
#
So I had to step in, I couldn’t let them
keep Boolean him.

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A guy named John Hitler was tired of people bullying him for his name so he went to the federal court and changed it hoping the harassments would stop.

But Peter Hitler is still getting bullied to this day.

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A thug starts harassing a nun on a bus

He's saying things to her like 'show me what's under that outfit' and 'I bet you're not wearing any underwear'. The nun is clearly uncomfortable and eventually clutches her bible to her chest and yells 'LORD PROTECT ME' and gets off the bus at the next stop.


The thug starts yelling abus...

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I was accused of harassment at work today.

When I told my wife she said, "Harassment what?"
I said, "I swear baby her ass meant nothing to me!"

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All we need now is for someone to come forward and say EA has been sexually harassing them

Actually, that applies to all of us. They've been fucking us for years.

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What's the difference between flirting and sexual harassment?

Whether or not the woman finds the man attractive.

Teacher: Make a sentence with the word "harassment"

**Student**: "her-ass-meant" a lot to me

**Teacher:** Coward!!

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My teacher told me to write a sentence using the word harassment...

So I wrote I know a girl and "her ass meant" a lot to me.

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Why aren't we using Tide to prevent sexual harassment?

After all, it deters gents.

What do Barack Obama and Donald Trump have in common?

Both are former presidents of the USA and both are harassed for the color of their skin.

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Our boss called our team over to talk us about sexual harassment

Turns out I’m pretty good at it.

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Thoughtful Gesture

N Y Governor Cuomo assured the public that he always wore his face mask while sexually harassing his accusers

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Today i got a memo from the HR for sexual harassment..

All that happened was a female co-worker came wearing a t-shirt with the caption "GUESS"

So i said " might be 32C " ..

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Peter Dinkalage has been accused of sexual harassment.

He allegedly told the woman that her hair smelled nice.

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Your dick is so small, that ...

Your dick is so small, that if you would sexual harass someone, it would be a Micro aggression.

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What do you call a robot that sexually harasses people?

R2 #metoo

My friend was harassing me with bird puns

But toucan play at that game.

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David Blaine is being investigated for sexual harassment.

Let's see if he can get out of that.

Q: What do small businesses cry when account executives harass them for money?

A: Yelp!

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What do you call a droid who was sexually harassed in the workplace?

R2MeToo

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[OC] An airline captain is holding interviews for a new copilot after the former one retired

He holds a series of back to back interviews, each one going seemingly better than the last. On the last scheduled interview for the day, a man walks in holding a human turd. He places the turd in the chair facing the captain. Seeing the captain's confused look, the man explains that the turd will b...

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Why did Medusa have to take sexual harassment training?

Because she wouldn't stop objectifying people.

I caught my friend harassing some electricity.

I told him it was an abuse of power.

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I reported a cashier to her management for sexually harassing me

She was checking me out.

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With all the stories about how everyone's being sexually harassed

...I'm starting to think I might be ugly.

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I got a sexual harasser fired today

Is anyone hiring right now? Im a very hands on learner.

So this dude dies and goes to heaven.

As he's approaching the pearly gates, St Peter says to him. "Okay, it's like this. You don't get into heaven just for being good anymore. You have to have done something really great. Can you think of anything that might qualify you?" The man says. "Well, I once saw a group of really mean bikies har...

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John the skeleton was fired for sexual harassment

Employees of the firm filed complaints about his perpetual boner

My son might have a drinking problem

He is up all hours of the night harassing everybody in the household until he gets his fix.
He doesn't stop until he's completely passed out. There's no talking to him,
he either completely ignores you or just mumbles on incoherently.
And this has been going on three months now; si...

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Harassment

Little Johnny's teacher asked him, "Johnny, use 'harassment' in a sentence."
Little Johnny replied, "Her mouth said 'no', but her ass meant 'yes'."

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Did you hear about the first robot sexual harassment case?

Yeah, it was R2Me2...

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Caitlyn Jenner just became the latest to expose another sexual harasser.

She is alleging Bruce Jenner groped her about 10 years ago.

Yesterday, I saw a guy harassing a diabetic who recently had parts of his foot amputated.

I guess the first guy was lack toes intolerant.

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So Amy Schumer claims that a big time producer, sexually harassed her by asking her for a blow job.

Turns out, he was just telling her she sucks.

Harassment.

So a teacher asks her students to use the word harassment in a sentence. A boy stood up and said, "Ok this is easy. I met a beautiful girl one day and harassment a lot to me"

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Such an unfair world. When a man talks dirty to a woman it's considered sexual harassment.

But when a woman talks dirty to a man it's £2.50/min (charges may vary).

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A woman came into our work yesterday to give us all a talk about sexual harassment in the work place.

A woman came into our work yesterday to give us all a talk about sexual harassment in the work place. After the presentation she asked, "Has anyone got any questions?"
I put my hand up and asked, "What colour knickers have you got on?"

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I'm a pervert that aspires to be a sexual harassment lawyer.

Ok, so I really just want to get myself off in court.

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Which 3 US bills have to do with sexual harassment of women?

Bill Cosby
Bill O'reilly
Bill Clinton

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Sexual harassment allegations have been made against Lou Bega

7 women have come forward and the assaults have been said to have taken place in varying locations including: in the sun and by his side

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My workplace scheduled Sexual Harassment Training.

Needless to say, I was greatly disappointed.

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Today at work we had a talk about sexual harassment

Personally I thought it was a bit of a touchy subject.

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TIL during the shooting of "Who framed Roger Rabbit?", Porky Pig was accused of sexually harassing Tinkerbell

On contacting Porky Pig, he replied "Th- Th- Th- That's all Hoax!"

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Did you see the story on Twitter about the robots from Star Wars alleging sexual harassment?

They are using #OurTooMeToo

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TIL that Melvil Dewey, inventor of the Dewey Decimal system for organizing library collections, was known to be a serial sexual harasser.

Someone really should've put him in his place.

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I had to file a sexual harassment claim against a squirrel in the park yesterday...

...he wouldn't stop trying to grab my nut sack.

My son gets harassed and abused by every single kid at his school.

He's being hyperboled.

I asked the librarian if he had any books on harassment.

He said "no" so I asked him 35 more times.

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OC: By a hobo, to a hobo, about a hobo (a Melvin tale)

(This story was told to me by my friend Mondo, about our mutual friend Melvin. We're all hobos here, living on the streets in the affluent community of Roseville, California. If you're ever in the area and you see a frail old man carrying a massive green rucksack, give ol' Melvin a beer for me. He w...

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Harassment

A man walks into the human resources office at work. The HR representative tells the man to sit down and tell him why a female employee is suing the company for sexual harassment. The man replies, "Her ass meant nothing to me, I was staring at her tits."

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"Driver, I believe that I was sexually harassed!"

On a senior citizen bus tour, the driver was surprised.

While the passengers were unloading, to do some sightseeing, one elderly lady stopped and whispered in his ear,
"Driver, I believe that I was sexually harassed!"

The driver didn't think much of this complaint, but promised he...

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There's only one thing I remember from sexual harassment training.

"Harass" is just one word.

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Save yourself from a sexual harassment case.

If a fellow employee asks, "Do you know a place I can get Off?". They may just need some bug spray.

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Guy: Police, yeah there's this black kid harassing a homeless person.

Police: You had me at black

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Dwarfs and Sexual Harassment

Dawn, a tall attractive office assistant complains to human relations in her firm that every time she goes to the photocopier a nearby worker named Philbert comes up close to her and says "Mmm, your hair smells nice." Hermagrude, the kind , wise human relations officer says placatingly, "Well Dawn, ...

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