UPJOKE
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Sleeveless Jokes

Why do Americans wear sleeveless t-shirts?

Because they have the right to bare arms

A large woman, wearing a sleeveless sun dress, walked into a bar in Dublin...

She raised her right arm, revealing a huge, hairy armpit and, as she pointed
to all the people sitting at the bar she asked, "What man here will buy a lady a drink?"

The bar went silent as patrons tried to ignore her. But down at the end of the bar,
an owly-eyed drunk slammed his hand ...

My entire family really loves sleeveless clothing.

So we invest in vests, in vests.

Oprah promises prosecution of all women in sleeveless dresses when she takes office

She is against the right to bare arms.

What do you call a reptilian detective that wears a sleeveless shirt and just can't let something go?

An InVESTed Gator

I was standing in line at the bank behind a woman in a sleeveless summer dress when I noticed a tattoo across her back between her shoulders.

It was words but words but I couldn't tell what it said. Suddenly she turned around and asked what the hell are you staring at. I said, "I didn't mean to upset you, I am just not good at reading people".

It's a beautiful warm spring day and a man and his wife are at the zoo. She's wearing a cute, loose-fitting, pink spring dress, sleeveless with straps.

As they walk through the ape exhibit and
pass in front of a very large gorilla, the
gorilla goes ape. He jumps up on the bars,
holding on with one hand (and 2 feet), grunting
and pounding his chest with the free hand. He is
obviously excited at the pretty lady in the wavy
dress....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Scam alert! Men beware

During the recent hot weather here in the UK we have had a couple of young women operating a scam at our local supermarket. They offer a while-you-wait car valeting service - you just drive in and while you sit there, one of them washes the outside of the car while the other vacuums the inside. They...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Romance and music

I got into the house tonight and there was a lovely smell of a joint roasting.

Candles were lit, there was some chill out music playing and a bottle of wine was on the coffee table with two glasses.

I smiled and went into the kitchen, where she had her back to me.

I watched her ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Fancy Restaurant

A hillbilly finds himself in an unfamiliar part of town and he's hungry. He pulls his rust bucket into the parking lot of a restaurant and approaches the front door with his sleeveless tee-shirt, holey ripped jeans, shaggy beard, do-rag, and tattoos but he's stopped by the Maitre'D before he can en...

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