I was offered a job as a noise pollution officer...
But I had to turn it down.
How bad is light pollution?
One of Orion's dogs was put down.
What do you call the Kardashian family taking a swim in the ocean?
Air pollution is so low
That my wife is able to see her mistakes
There would be less pollution in the world if everyone joined reddit.
We've been teaching people how to recycle the same material for years.
The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven.
At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur "Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want to in heaven"...
Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said, "I want to hang out with God." St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room, and introduced him to God. God recognized Arthur and commented, "Okay, so you were the one who invented the Harley-Davidson motorcycle?" Arthur said, "Yeah, that's me.....
Girlfriend: At least with the quarantine, the air pollution levels are down
Me: Well I kinda like the air pollution, it adds to the atmosphere.
Pollution levels have come down so drastically
That my wife is now seeing things from my point of view!
Wife-Husband Peaceful Relationship
They asked him why your relationship with your wife is always peaceful and no fight ever?! He replied that is because we agreed since the beginning that she takes decisions in small issues leaving me the big ones. For example, she takes decisions in: What house or car to buy; what school we choose f...
I found a genie in a bottle who granted me three wishes.
Being selfless, I wished for world peace, reduce pollution and less traffic.
Should’ve read the terms and conditions. My bad.
Due to less pollution in the air
cloud files are clearly visible now
Apparently the USA is the biggest contributor to noise pollution in the world
My solution: put a silencer in every school
Poseidon, Zeus, and Hades sit down for a drink.
They know that, because of those pesky humans, it will be their last meeting in a long time. Zeus is attempting to combat climate change, Poseidon is dealing with rampant pollution and rising sea levels, and Hades needs to update his infrastructure to deal with the massive influx of souls after WW3....
Isis sent 8 terrorists to China
A few years ago, ISIS did train eight people for many months before sending them on terrorist missions to China.
The first guy’s target was Beijing’s most complex interchange. He passed out due to motion sickness.
The second guy wanted to blow up a public bus in Shanghai during rush ho...
What do you call one lawyer thrown off a bridge?
Call Captain Planet
The residents of a town are fed up with all of the pollution from factories, littering, and toxic waste.
Finally, a townsperson says, "We need Captain Planet!"
A moment later, a superhero looking dude shows up and says, "Did someone summon me?
The townspeople rejoice, an...
A first grade teacher had twenty-five students in her class and she presented each child in her class the first half of a well known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you. ...
What happens when the pollution rises in Los Angeles?
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Holmes and Watson go out camping.
Sherlock Holmes and his good friend Dr. Watson decide to make a trip to the countryside and go camping.
In the middle of the night, Sherlock wakes up Watson and asks him:
"John, look up at the sky. What do you see?"
Watson, still sleepy, slowly arranges his thoughts: "The... ...
What do you call it when Kim K. goes to the beach?