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Russian Roulette Jokes

Russian roulette

5 out of 6 people recommend

We've all heard about Russian Roulette but how many of you have heard about Indian Roulette?

They give you a flute and six large deadly cobras.

And one of the cobras is deaf.

Russian roulette may be the easiest game on earth

Not a single person alive has ever lost at it

I tried to warn my son about the dangers of Russian roulette...

It went in one ear and out the other.

My dad is a professional Russian roulette player.

He only lost once.

My friend loves playing Roulette, so I figured I would introduce him to Russian Roulette.

Blew his mind.

Me: "When we were little, my brothers and I used to play Russian roulette." Friend: "You don't have any brothers."

Me: "Right."

The only game Chuck Norris has ever lost was Russian Roulette.

He’s lost a few times, actually.

Russian Roulette is pretty easy

Just ask anyone who’s played, they all say they won

The thing with Russian Roulette is

you don't want to go last.

Six stormtroopers decided to play Russian Roulette.

They got away with a warning but had to pay for the damage.

Statistically 100,000 people die each year playing Russian roulette ....

It's mind-blowing!

5 out of 5 people enjoy Russian Roulette.

There was supposed to be a sixth, but he never got back to me about his experience.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My girlfriend and I played Russian Roulette once

We had sex afterwards even though she lost

Me: *playing Russian roulette* you first

Him: this is an automatic

Me: my house my rules

I invited my friends to play Russian Roulette with me.

We had a blast playing.

Russian roulette is really fun

5/6 of me and my friends say it’s safe. R.I.P. Dylan

Coke is like Russian roulette:

If the first time is mind-blowing your life is probably over

I was the referee in a Russian Roulette tournament

I did an excellent job, none of the losers complained

Russian Roulette is completely safe to play!

I interviewed people who played and %100 said that they all survived!

My friend is a man of extreme luck. He won the Russian roulette 5 times in a row!

\*was

My friends and I used to love a good game of Russian Roulette.

Unfortunately, they're a bunch of sore losers and won't play it with me anymore.

Six reasons not to play russian roulette.

The fifth one will blow your mind!

Russian roulette

five out of six scientists claim that playing russian roulette its absolutely safe!

Alexei Navalny must be really, really good at Russian Roulette.

I just don't know how many more days he can keep up this winning streak.

I watched a group of people play "Soviet Russian Roulette" .

It was just like Russian Roulette,

Just that everyone died equally.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Won a game of Russian roulette

Walked away with $80 but their casinos are a shit hole

Did you hear about the guy who played russian roulette with a semiautomatic?

He got the first round.

let's play russian roulette with a shrink ray! i'll go first

^oh ^come ^on

What do you call Russian roulette for vampires?

High stakes poker.

I reckon I have a lucky gene for russian roulette

My grandad played all the time and he only lost once.
I'll bet my life on it.

I've recently discovered how amazing russian roulette is

It's absolutely mind blowing

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Zambian version of Russian Roulette

As usual, things were not going well at the United Nations. Thus, many visiting ambassadors had to room together. It just so happened that Vladimir, the Russian Ambassador, and Umballa, the Zambian Ambassador, were sharing a suite.
To pass the time, Vladimir introduced his fellow dignitary to the...

My uncle died

He found it mind blowing that you can't play Russian roulette with a Glock

Click here for a potential once in a lifetime opportunity!

Thank you for entering the Russian roulette tournament.

What activity can reduce a person's chance of dying of cancer by 16.6%?

Russian Roulette.

If you can't handle losing....

... 'Russian Roulette' is an excellent choice of game.

In solidarity with much of the world pulling Russian products off the shelves ...

In solidarity with much of the world pulling Russian products off the shelves and banning them from events, I will do my part and not play Russian Roulette for the foreseeable future.

I am going to retire with my casino winnings.

Either through black jack or Russian roulette!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Russian goes to Thailand

A Russian goes to Thailand and is hanging out with the locals. He asks if they've ever played Russian roulette.

"We have our own version. There are six women. You pick one, and she gives you a blowjob."

"What's the danger in that?"

"One of them is a man."

The President of Ethiopia pays a visit to Moscow to meet Vladimir Putin

So the two sit down and discuss their politics when Putin says, "Hey, I'm bored, we have a fun little game we play here called Russian Roulette. We should play it."

"How do you play?" The President of Ethiopia asks.

"Easy, here's a pistol. It has a round and some empty slots. Point th...

What do you call it when Donald Trump picks a new member of the government?

Russian Roulette.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man takes a trip to Africa... [NSFW]

he decides to take a walk around the local village and experience the African culture first hand. he stumbles onto something he's never seen before. six African women were sitting in a circle with a bottle laying in the middle. a man walks by and spins the bottle. the bottle points to one of the wom...

Three men discover they have each been the victim of a shipwreck at some point in their past.

Three men are talking about their brushes with disaster, and by a stunning coincidence they find that all three of them have, at some point in their lives, been shipwrecked and stranded with the other survivors on a deserted island. They begin to detail their experiences.

"The hardest part wa...

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