UPJOKE
rhinocerosafricakeratinwhite rhinocerosblack rhinocerosmammalhornfamilymioceneplioceneperissodactylcrocodilenoseasiapoaching

Why did the rhino break his phone?

The instructions told him to charge it!

A man gets pulled over by a cop for driving with a rhino in his car.

"Sir, are you aware that driving with a rhino in your car is illegal?" The cop said. The man looks bewildered.

"Really? I had no clue!"

"I'll let you off this time, but only if you promise to take it straight to the zoo."

The man agrees and the cop lets him go.

A week lat...

Why don't you see rhinos hiding in trees?

Because they're really good at it.

Rhinos have bad eyesight

But with their size, that's someone else's problem.

What do you call an elephant mixed with a rhino?

Ell if I know

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?

Elephino.

Someone once asked me why rhinos were called rhinos.

I just said "well, rhi-not?"

How do you stop a charging rhino?

Unplug it.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?

Answer: 'Ell if I know!


Follow-up #1: What do you call a deer with no eyes?


Answer: No idear.


Follow-up #2: What do you call a deer with no eyes and no nuts?

Answer: No fucking idear.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"Okay Fred, Shaggy and Daphne, can you name an animal that lives in Africa and has a large horn on its face?" "Rhino!"

"We know you know the answer, Scooby, but it's not your turn!"

I have a real problem with rhino poaching.

You have to get the pan custom-made and then it takes forever to get the water hot.

What do you get when you mix a cheetah and a rhino?

A Cheeto

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It’s weird that the rhinos are dying out

Because they’re so horny

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

why did the rhino watch porn

he was horny

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino?

Elephino. It just isn't rhelephant.

(This joke works best when said out loud.)

What do you get when you mate and Elephant with a Rhino?

You get thrown out of the Safari Park

What does the White Rhino have in common with Alex Trebec?

They’re both in jeopardy...

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?

A hearing with the ethics committee and a revoked veterinary license. “Elephino...” you disgust me.

How does a rhino order its eggs?

Poached.

What do you do when you're facing a Rhino with 3 balls?

Walk him and pitch to the Hippo.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Had my identity stolen by a rhino once. Had a bunch of purchases from Victoria Secret.

Guess he was horny.

A rhino walked into a bar...

Everyone left the bar in an organized matter as to avoid the potential threat.

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?

Eleph-ino

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a rhino that feels aroused?

Horny

How do you stop a Rhino from charging?

Nothing.
They're extinct now so you dont have to.

How do you keep a rhino from charging

Take away his credit card.

A joke a coworker told me today: What do you get when you combine a cow, a duck, a piece of wood, and a rhino?

Cow the duck wood rhino?

The animals were bored.

Finally the lion had an idea. He tells the other animals how he's seen the humans play a game called American football. He proceeded to tell them how it's played and explained its rules. This got them excited.

They chose their teams and went out to an open field. The lion's team received, and...

So a rhino walks into a bar...

and several patrons pay their tabs and leave because they see the danger in this situation.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Grandpa storie

Gramps: "Once on safari in Africa, we were charged by a rutting Rhino, and I crapped my pants"

Kid: "I would have too Grandpa"

Gramps: "No boy, I *just now* crapped my pants.."

Go Back To Africa

is what I say whenever I see a White Rhino.

If a rhino and a elephant had a baby, what would you name it?

Helliphino



[hell-if-I-know]

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