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Queens Jokes

Why couldn't the chemist laugh at the queens fart?

Because noble gases are nonreactive.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Queens Breasts

Once upon a time there lived a beautiful Queen with large breasts.



Nick, the Dragon Slayer, obsessed over the Queen for this reason. He knew that the penalty for his desire would be death, should he try to touch them, but he had to try.



One day Nick revealed his secret ...

The Queens Pallbearers

Breaking news: the queen’s dying wish was to have Princes Charles, Andrew, Harry, William along with Meghan and Kate serve as her official pallbearers.

So they could let her down one last time…

What's the most famous Queens of the Stone Age song?

I tried to google it but it said that no one knows.

How did the drag queens decide what kind of sauce base to make?

They took a roux poll

Why don't drag queens drown? (OC)

Because they're flamboyant.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why does Indiana Jones hate drag queens?

They're booby traps

I met a guy the other day who said he was from Queens

I said I'm from regular parents myself

When someone has two queens in chess...

You know there's been cheating.


I wonder how many times this joke will go over people's heads.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Queens Riddle

Barack Obama met with the Queen of Great Britain.

He asked her, "Your Majesty, how do you run such an efficient government? Are there any tips you can give me?"

"Well," said the Queen, "the most important thing is to surround yourself with intelligent people."

Obama frowned, and...

When using the Queens toilet at Buckingham Palace, it's only ever proper manners.....

To do a curtsy flush

What drink does Kings and Queens enjoy?

Royal-Tea

Many centuries ago, some thrill-seeking kings & queens would hire a special kind of jester to sneak up on them and try to scare the heck outta them at bedtime, what was it called?

Nightmare fool.

Why do queens always carry scepters?

Everyone has to work scept her

A man is trying to sell his dog to a neighbor...

"You can have this dog for only five dollars, and he can actually talk." says the man. His neighbor says, "That's ridiculous, everyone knows dogs can't speak."

The dog looks up at the neighbor with big, sad, doggy eyes and says, "Oh please, kind sir, buy me so I won't have to live with my cru...

What is a Queens favorite kind of weather?

Reign!

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