Primitive Jokes

...and spends years with them, teaching them all about the wonders of science, mathematics, and formatting Reddit comments so they get the most upvotes. One day, the Chief's wife gives birth to... a white child!

The word spreads, and the entire tribe is in shock. The chief pulls the professo... read more

They don't want to ever reach a petabyte.

^((Haha PETA bad))

A meanderthal

A meanderthal.

Today, in civilized society, it is called golf.

He has become a friend of the people, and has taught them much. One day, one of the chieftain's many wives gives birth to an albino child. The chieftain has never seen such such a thing, and immediately assumes that his wife has been unfaithful and has been intimate with the only white man in the fo... read more

A farmer who produced free range eggs gave a visitor a tour.

"And in this corner, the hens take some of the grain that we give them and put it in that old water dish, where it ferments and becomes a kind of primitive beer."

The visitor replied "Wow! Chicken brewers! I wonder if it's mo... read more

He gave all of mankind a chance.

"Humans, I offer you the gift of words. The ultimate tool. These words are reusable, renewable, and refutable. Go do what you please with this divine gift!"

God watched from his pedestal as primitive man and woman jumped about in excitement alike.
<... read more

He demands, "Are you suggesting women are primitives?"

One day, some primitive guys were watching their wives drag a dead mastodon to the food & fire area. It was exhausting work; the guys were getting tired just watching.

Then they noticed some large, smooth, rounded boulders and they had a great idea! They could sit on top of the boulders a... read more

An explorer, during a trek through an unknown jungle, made contact with a primitive tribe, and swapped basic language and customs. The day comes for the explorer to depart and, as a parting gift, he gives a fine silver mirror to the chief of the tribe. The chief takes the mirror in awe, and as the e... read more

The year is 13,000 BC. The first human migrants to America are about to cross the land bridge between Eastern Russia and Alaska. The navigator seems a bit lost.

"You alright?" They ask him, waiting eagerly at the shore with a distant view of the new lands that awaited them.

"Yeah, I th... read more

In the 70s, a Soviet professor and two of his students are conducting an excavation in the Ural Mountains. They discover a well preserved man in the ice and they dig him up. He is wearing some primitive clothes, a stick and some unknown artefacts and they soon start arguing which age he is from. Wh... read more

have just moved from their primitive shtetl home in Europe to a modern, state-of-the art apartment in New York. They are totally unfamiliar with all the necessities of the modern home.

Mrs. Finkelstein goes to the bathroom to wash her hands and is taken aback by the mirror, having never seen ... read more

The are four aliens passing by our solar system. The don’t know a word of English. Their spaceship malfunctions and they manage to eject the escape pods before they crash land on Earth. Each alien lands in a different spot on the planet. They each decide they might as well try to learn some English ... read more