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Packages Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So Land O’Lakes got rid of the Native American on their package...

...But kept the land. Sounds oddly familiar.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Severance Packages

The department of defense, in an effort to cut some costs decides to offer severance packages to some superfluous higher ranking officers. The offer is an honorable discharge and $1,000 for every inch between two points of their body of their choosing.

A Navy admiral takes this opportunity an...

What do packages taste like?

Parsley.

What does Harry Potter use when sealing packages?

His Parceltongue.

Jokes are like packages.

While the content is important you mustn't forget about the delivery.

What system does Satan use to weigh packages?

Penta-grams

Great things come in small packages

Is what i say everytime before i whip it out.

It always irked my single mother that her grocery store didn’t carry eggs in packages of six—just by the dozen.

Then one day, her wish came true. She walked into the grocery and found fresh eggs in cartons of six. “I was so excited,” she told us later, “that I bought two!”

Kept having my Amazon packages stolen off my porch ordered a security cam to deter/catch the culprit.

That package was stolen too.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A congressman was seated in first class next to a little girl on an airplane.

He turned to her and said, "Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger." The little girl, who had just started to read her book, replied to the total stranger, "What would you want to talk about?"

"Oh, I don't know," said the congressma...

Lake Zurich High was closed down Monday due to reports of a suspicious package. For help, Police called in Jerry Sandusky, who investigates high school packages all the time.

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