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Mythical Creature Jokes

What mythical creature fights for the rights of other mythical creatures?

Unioncorns.

What mythical creature always gets lost?

A where-wolf

Which mythical creature has the hardest time reproducing?

A Unic- horn.

What mythical creature keeps time for trains at the station?

A metro-gnome

Which mythical creature casts no reflection?

All of them, technically.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you need before having sex with a mythical creature?

Consentaur

What do you call the mythical creature that is half horse, half virologist?

The Centaur for disease control.

Have cryptozoologists ever proven the existence of a mythical creature?

Not yeti.

The paraplegic mythical creature wasn't walking...

He was draggin!

After a long day at work, I feel like half a mythical creature...

Because I'm Dragon Ass

A good lawyer, the Tooth-fairy, Santa Claus, and a homeless man are walking down the street,

They see a 100$ bill, who gets it?

The homeless man obviously, the rest are mythical creatures

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My favorite mythological creature.

My favorite mythical creature is the happy bitch in tampon commercials.

What movies teach us:

AMERICAN MOVIES TEACH US:

1. Chinese have nothing better to do than teaching or practice Kung Fu.

2. More than 50% of U.S. population are FBI/CIA agents, working undercover.

3. The purpose of school system of U.S. is to promote basketball / baseball.

4. Aliens have specia...

Was walking past a friendly coworker the other day when he stopped me and asked..

Friend: You see that dude over there? (he points to this guy obviously screwing sound)

Me: Yeah, what about him?

Friend: He's a mythical creature.

Me: (*Chuckling*) What are you talking about?

Friend: Just look closely. (I lean in and squint to get a better look) Don't yo...

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