There's a centaur walking around in a hazmat suit.

He's from the Centaurs for disease control.

A Centaur walks into a bar, and the bartender asks him "So, why the long face?"

I'm half horse...the wrong half.

The centaur didn't want to settle down with just one mate

He was ponyamorous.

Inb4 comment: He liked the hores

What do you get if you cross a human and a centaur?

A Quarter Horse.

What did King Midas say to the young centaur?

Stay gold, ponyboy

Where does a half-man, half- horse play tennis at Wimbledon?

Centaur Court

Where does a person end and a horse start?

At the centaur.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the centaur never get a singing career?

He was a bit hoarse.

Two Centaurs

Two centaurs are playing rough and things getting heated. Are they man-handling each other or just horsing around?

Donald Trump Stands like a centaur without its hind legs.

This is because the only thing he cares about is being the centaur of attention.

Lately I've been feeling a little invisible and have decided that to get noticed, I will have my legs removed and replaced with a horse's body...

...That way, wherever I go, I will be the centaur of attention.

My friend looked me dead in the eyes and went "Imagine if you were half horse."

"You would be the centaur of attention."

I'd never hire a centaur.

I've heard they tend to do half assed jobs.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Centaur sex:

Putting the semen in horsemen.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a centaur that works as a prostitute?

A whorse.

Palooky: Hey look at that - precisely 100 Centaurs!

Mooky: Technically bro, that's actually one Dollaraur.

A thirsty man comes to a bar, but the bouncer is a centaur and won't let him in.

The centaur says, "This bar is for hybrid creatures only. For example, my father was a man and my mother was a horse. I just let in a griffin because his father was a lion and his mother was an eagle."

The man thinks fast and says, "OK, then let me in. My father was the Minotaur, and my mothe...

Where do centaurs shop for clothes?


I got pretty sick last week, and then a centaur showed up!

He said he was the Centaur for Disease Control.

According to Greek Mythology, Chiron was a half-human, half-horse doctor.

This made him the Centaur for Disease Control.

So a centaur walks into a bar

The bartender says, "Hey, how's the sore throat?"

The centaur replies, "My throat isn't horse but my legs are."

What do you call a talkative man-horse?

The centaur of attention.

So with the popularity of the recent centaur joke, I was going to make a joke about a half-man, half-goat.

I decided against it... it wasn't very fauny anyway.

Nobody believes that I was born half Zentaur half human.

The top half of my body is Zentaur (Centaur) but the bottom half is human.

I find this funny but so far nobody else does. Can I improve the joke somehow?

Used to know this guy who always tried to draw attention to the fact he was half-horse.

Never could stop being the centaur of attention.

What do you call the mythical creature that is half horse, half virologist?

The Centaur for disease control.

I read about this figure from Greek Mythology, Chiron.

He trained many heroes apparently, and was also a doctor. Ergo he was a Centaur for disease control.

Did you know mythological creatures have their own dentist's office?

It's true, I saw it today and they were suuuuuuper busy! The waiting room was packed, and every time the orderly would come out to call in another patient, the half-man-half-horse would get all excited; "is it my turn now? oh, pick me, pick me!" and all that jazz. Of course, every time it was actual...

A man and a woman are out to dinner at a fancy restaurant

Right around when the appetizers they hear a loud sound like galloping hooves on the marble floor.

They both turn to see a half-man half-horse jogging around the restaurant

Eventually it stops running and stands at attention.

They stare

A loud trumpet sounds and the Head ...

In Greek mythology, Chiron was known for his knowledge and skill with medicine

One could even call him the Centaur for Disease Control.

He was a big believer in herd immunity.

That half man, half horse...

Did you hear about the half man, half horse causing a ruckus downtown last night? He was kicking over trash cans, yelling at people, just going crazy. The cops finally showed up, calmed him down, and asked "Why are you doing this?" Apparently he wanted to be the centaur of attention.

Scientists have discovered a new creature.

The creature resembles a centaur from the legends and it seems to be always receiving a lot of attention from other animals and plants.

Tldr: it's a Centaur of attention.

D&D character name

I'm going to make a half man half horse cleric and name it centaur for disease control

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