This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Me (to a sentient piece of human shit): "Hey, what were you before you were shit?" Shit: "Well, before I was consumed, masticated, and digested, I was a beautiful French baguette." "Does it disappoint you, that you were once so beautiful but are now a piece of shit?

"Are you kidding? I was bread for this."

You should never masticate in your bed...

You'll get crumb everywhere.

I have a serious problem of chewing with my mouth open when I eat anything...

...my family is always horrified when I masticate in public.

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