You should tip bakers often.

They really knead it.

Why are pizza makers always poor?

Because they knead dough to make a living.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dough Boy

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman Pop N. Fresh died Wednesday of a severe yeast infection. He was 71.

He was buried Friday in one of the biggest funerals in years. Dozens of celebrities turned out including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker, and the Hostess Twinki...

Bakers trade bread recipes...

on a knead-to-know basis.

Why did the man quit his job at the bakery?

He didn't knead any more dough.

What did the pastry chef say to his boss to get a raise?

I knead dough

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[NSFW] why is masturbation like making pickle bread?

First, you knead a dill dough.

I had to start deliverin pizzas

Cause i knead the dough

My dad told me to stop petting the cat because its claws were starting to dig into his skin.

I kept petting the cat. Who am I to stop this poor soul from getting what it kneads?

Girl I'm dating from the bakery is really selfish...

All she talks about is her knead's, it's really getting a rise out of me.

I just wanted cookies.

What did the pizzeria owner say while having withdrawals?

Give me the dough, I KNEAD IT

I can’t leave my cat

She kneads me.

Why did the baker throw a loaf in the trash?

Because he didn't knead it

I started working for a pizza company

I don't enjoy it, I just knead the dough

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔


Caress, praise, pamper, relish, savor, massage, make plans, fix, empathize, serenade, compliment, support, feed, tantalize, bathe, humor, placate, stimulate, jiffylube, stroke, console, purr, hug, coddle, excite, pacify, protect, phone, correspond, anticipate, nuzzle, smooch, toast, minister to,...

I asked my local baker for her amazing bread recipe.

She said it's on a knead to dough basis.

I bought a bread-maker but the sales assistant tried to talk me out of it

He said there was no knead

I whispered to my kids, "Have you all heard about the top secret bakery?"

They all looked at me blankly, so I replied, "I didn’t think so, it’s on a knead to dough basis."

A baker approaches a crime scene and asks the cop what happened...

"Sorry, that's on a knead to dough basis."

Five years and she was leaving.

The dough was walking down the steps with her packed bag refusing to look back. The baker wanted to know what it was he had to say, but there were no words for him to find there. He reached a hand out at the air behind her and whispered, "Please, I knead you."

A worker in a bakery asked his boss for a raise.

When asked to provide a reason why, he replied, "I knead the dough."

Did you know that dough is necessary to have bread?

In other words: you knead dough to make bread

People often ask me why I decided to become a baker.

It's because I knead the dough.

Bread is classified information!

It's on a knead-to-dough basis.

A baker once gave me the secret to dill flavoured bread

"You really gotta knead that dill dough"

Why do bakers start working so early in the morning?

Because they knead dough.

Bakers have a weird way of trading bread recipes.

Its done on a knead to know basis. Gotta get the dough somehow

I understand why bakers are addicted to baking bread.

Sometimes they just knead it.

Why are bakers so secretive?

Because they work on a knead to know basis

Bakeries are very dependent on money

They knead the dough.

Is the bakery hiring?

Cause I think I'll knead a little bit of dough to get by.

A father asked his son how baking school was going

"I knead some dough."

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