This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Justice is best served cold.

Because if it were served warm, it would be justwater.

How many social justice warriors does it take to change a light bulb?

Just kidding, social justice warriors can't change anything.

Donald Trump better not remove Justice Ginsberg from the supreme court.

that would be ruthless

Justice has been served [long, English humour]

Justice has been served!
There's been some scumbag called Carl going round breaking in to people's houses near me for months, but the police can't catch him. The weirdest thing about it all, is he was breaking into people's houses and ruining their washing machines by putting bricks in to them &a...

Social Justice Warriors Favorite Sandwich:

Lettuce, Guacamole, Bacon and Tomato

I caught a bunch of social justice warriors in my yard digging up large wooden stakes

They said the posts had to be removed before they caused a fence.

Why do social justice warriors hate dentists?

Because they make teeth straight and white.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

The Department of Justice has announced the approval of a merger between Reddit and a Hindu temple

This is anticipated to create $50 million of synergies in the karma industry.

Did you hear about the insomniac social justice activist?

He was woke af

Picking a Supreme Court Justice is a lot like crossing a river...

It all comes down to Roe v Wade

Did you hear about the judge who exposed himself during sentencing?

Apparently he wanted to meat out some justice.

What's the difference between a gun and a social justice warrior?

The gun has only one trigger.

My wife asked me how Wonder Woman got her new sword in the Justice League movie...

I told her that she must have Amazon Prime

Criminal Justice is a lot like racial humor.

It’s the dark ones that get in trouble.

What is justice Brett Kavanaugh’s first case?

Coors Light

The US Justice Department were hellbent on taking IKEA to court a few years ago.

Unfortunately they had to walk away as they were having difficulties putting a case together.

A rapist and con artist get caught by the sheriff in a small town.

The town doesn’t have much money to take care of prisoners so the sheriff gets an idea. He decides he’ll charge money to let the townspeople punish the crooks and use the money to keep them in jail for as long as he can. The sheriff figures even a short stay in jail will be plenty after a little “ju...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Best joke I have heard in a few months... let's see if I can do it justice!

A guy enters a Halloween party just in his pants.

Guy 1: what are you dressed as?
Guy 2: I came as pre mature ejaculation!
Guy 1: okay? Why don't you have a shirt or shoes?
Guy 2: well, I just came in my pants!

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

The Justice League has a vacancy and the number 7 is interviewing to fill a superhero position...

Batman: Thank you for coming, 7. Its been rough since the Flash took off and we're having a hard time finding someone to replace him. Let's get right to it. What is your first power?


Number 7: Well, for my whole life I've been in prime condition and I don't anticipate that changing anytim...

It's appropriate that Cyborg from the Justice League is black,

Considering that he's only 3/5 of a person.

One day, Justice Ginsburg will no longer be a part of the Supreme Court

On that day, the court will be Ruthless.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Wonderwoman was sunbathing naked on top of the justice league tower...

Superman was flying over and he had the idea that "hey I'm quick as lightning, I could go down there and have sex with her really quick then be out of there in a second." So he flies down, gets the job done and flies off. Wonderwoman jumps up and goes "what the hell was that?" Invisible man replies ...

What’s the opposite of Social Justice Warrior?

A Status Quosader

President Trump accidentally bumped into Chief Justice Roberts.

Trump: "Pardon me."

Roberts: "Well that is your absolute right."

Justice

The word of the day is "just."

"Just" is a fun word, because it can mean both "absolutely" and "barely."

Examples:

That's just fantastic.
-and-
That's just enough.

"Just" may also be used to regard something as fair or deserved.

The judgement was just.
-an...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Did you hear about the supreme court justice who was caught stealing the scraps from restaurant booths?

Police identified her as Booth Raider Ginsburg.

Why are Social Justice Activists always warriors?

Because they don't have a high enough intelligence to be Social Justice Mages.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A Marine returns from duty in Iraq and is immediately reassigned to a remote location in Afghanistan.

That evening he arrives at his new post; a run down mosque in the middle of nowhere.

As he switches over with the marine currently stationed there, he realises there is no bed, no clean water, no toilet, just him, his weapon and the dirt on the floor.

The next morning he wakes up to f...

What's the difference between the Justice League reshoots and unlocking all the heroes in Battlefront 2?

One was only slightly cheaper than the other.

What do you call a werewolf who has taken an interest in social justice?

Awarewolf

What's a Social Justice Warrior's favorite math course?

Triggernometry.

Why is everyone a social justice warrior ?

Couldn't they pick another class ? Like social justice mage or social justice hunter ?

A man is on his death bed and he tells his wife fight never to fight with her in laws after his death.

He says otherwise every time she fights his body would turn in his grave. She agrees and he dies peacefully. The wife lives her life out and when dies is buried in the same cemetery. At the night she asks her neighbors have they seen her husband Bob.

The neighbors tell her there are like hund...

I made a gun in the style of a social justice warrior

It has too many triggers though.

Once upon a time in an old magical kingdom, there lived an young monk called Sam...

His order was renowned for their beautiful choral
singing. They trained, hours every day, refining
their voices and their art. Their song floated
down the mountainside, enriching the lives and
souls of the townspeople below

Sam was particularly gifted, and on his 19th
birthday,...

Why did Plastic Man get kicked out of Justice League?

He was accused of rubbery

A person is sentenced to death by freezing

It's justice.

I saw justice in action today for the first time ever.

I went out for breakfast this morning with my girlfriend, saw a Jehovah’s Witness lock himself out of his own house. Kept ringing the bell.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

My parents taught me well

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE . "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't stra...

A judge was annoyed to find that his car wouldn't start.

He called a taxi, and soon one arrived at his house.

Climbing in, he told the driver to take him to the halls of justice. "Where are they," asked the driver.

"You mean to say that you don't know where the courthouse is?" asked the incredulous judge.

"The courthouse? Of course I ...

Justice Scalia stated that he wants to be cremated after his death

Millions of women are meeting now to discuss if that's what is best for his body.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Scale of Justice

For three years, the young attorney had been taking his brief vacations at this country inn. The last time he'd finally managed an affair with the innkeeper's daughter. Looking forward to an exciting few days, he dragged his suitcase up the stairs of the inn, then stopped short. There sat his lover ...

What do you call a dyslexic small town spinster who takes justice into her own hands?

A Village-Auntie

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

One day Superman is flying over the Justice League building...

and he looks down to see Wonder Woman sprawled out on her back, naked, tanning.

"Wow she is so hot, if only I can have a chance at that!" He exclaimed to himself. Suddenly a thought occurred to him...

"Wait, I am Superman! I can fly down there and have sex with her and fly off so fast ...

When it comes to the DCU, Mr. Freeze truely was the superhero.

I mean, justice can't be spelt without "Just ice".

After watching social justice warrior's behaviour on YouTube. TIL: the old saying is true...

War doesn't determine who's on the right, only who's on the left.

Joker walks in a bar

Joker walks in a bar and takes a sit.

Batman comes disguised as a barman to take the order.

Joker - "Can you give me a martini with ice?"

Batman taking of the costume - " No, I will serve you justice"

Which member of the Justice League has loose connective tissue?

The Marfan Manhunter!

Southern Justice

Starting a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams.
I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, y...

Heavenly Justice

Once, there was a preacher who was an avid golfer. Every chance he could get, he would be on the golf course swinging away. It was an obsession. One Sunday was a picture-perfect day for golfing. The sun was out, no clouds were in the sky, and the temperature was just right.
The preacher was in a...

Hitler was the original Social Justice Warrior

Adolf Hitler is the story of a failed liberal art student who blamed it on ethnicities he deemed privileged.

Poetic Justice

Judge:

I find you guilty.
You are sentenced to ten years,
Take him away boys.

Prosecutor mutters, "Poetic Justice"

Southern Justice

While traveling in unfamiliar territory, a lawyer ran a stop sign and got pulled over by a small town sheriff.

The lawyer thinks for a minute and decides that he can talk his way out of a ticket. After all, he assumes that he must be much better educated than the southern sheriff.

Th...

The Social Justice League doesn't have a Batmobile

They have a tumbler.

What do you call an American linguist, philosopher, cognitive scientist, logician, political commentator, social justice activist, and anarcho-syndicalist advocate who doesn't eat ham?

NO-HAM CHOMPSKY

Why can't you hear the bass on Metallica's And Justice For All album?

Because they threw the bass player under the bus.

Atheist Bus Driver

(Turkish Joke, couldn't find it on Reddit, hopefully the translation does justice)

So I met a guy in jail whose nickname was "Atheist". I finally asked him why everyone called him this way; so he started telling his story:

"Well, I was a bus driver in our village. One day while driving...

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