Plato Jokes

Aristotle, Plato and Socrates walk into a café during the decline of the greek empire. The barista asks each of them why they think the empire is falling.

Aristotle gives a powerful speech about how the empire has failed to live up to its telos and deconstructs the very nature of what an em... read more

Clearly, all his relationships were platonic.

Historians have found that this uproar was due to his teachings being too Thot-provoking

You really learn to appreciate ancient grease.

He hands him a book and says, "Please accept my Apology".

You become Platonic

Plato was at the piano, and Aristotle was holding a small lute in his hands.

“Plato, do you know the unpredictability and exactitude of ethics and reflective philosophical hermeneutics require phronesis as an ontological counterpoint to peripatetic conjecture?”

“No,” Plato replied. “Bu... read more

In ancient Greece, Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom. One day, the great philosopher came upon an acquaintance who ran up to him excitedly and said, "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about one of your students?" "Wait a moment," Socrates replied. "Before you tell me I'd like you to pa... read more

The priest turns to the rabbi and says "God, I hope this joke isn't written by Plato."

"to do is to be" Plato
"to be is to do" Aristotle
"do be do be do" Frank Sinatra

Plato was discoursing on his theory of ideas and, pointing to the cups on the table before him, said while there are many cups in the world, there is only one `idea’ of a cup, and this cupness precedes the existence of all particular cups. 


“I can see the cups on the table,” said Diogenes... read more

Meno pause

To Do is to Be
-Socrates

To Be is to Do
-Plato

Do Be Do Be Do
-Sinatra

Mediocrities

Who was his busiest?

The one with a lot on his Plato

A few weeks ago, his teacher assigned the class to write a 10,000 word paper on a great philosopher, but with just 12 hours until the paper was due, Little Timmy had not written a single word. Realizing his predicament, Little Timmy hastily took a pencil out of his drawer and sat down in front of bl... read more

His teacher was Plato.

Plato

Moses, Jesus, and a bearded old man are playing golf. Moses drives a long one, which lands on the fairway but rolls directly toward the pond. Moses raises his club, parts the water, and the ball rolls safely to the other side.
Jesus also hits a long one toward the same pond, but just as it’s abou... read more

Dr. Who was traveling through time and space, when he came upon a cache of the universe's best wise sayings. He loaded them into the Tardis and decided to set up a shop on a nice little corner just outside of reality to sell the sayings to the great thinkers and writers of all time. He advertised hi... read more