What is the longest sentence in the English language?

Life imprisonment.

There have been no major protests against former Park Geun-hye's imprisonment.

No Free Park-ing in South Korea.

Quick, Short, Funny Court Appearance

Jerry Bartle was arrested and put on trial for robbing a local shop at gunpoint. In his wisdom he decided that he would represent himself in court. He appeared to be doing reasonably well until the shop's owner took the stand to give his evidence.

She had identified him immediately as the rob...

An Englishman, a German and a Frenchman...

...are all in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze when, all of a sudden, Saudi police rush in and arrest them. The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offence in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming the booze, they are all sentenced to death!
<...

Building that wall

The leaders of all the countries of the north and south American continant get together to discuss world problems and see what they can do to improve the world. After a long hard day President Donald Trump decides to go on a walk to think about what has been achieved, he is soon joined by the Prime ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman finds a lamp and of course it contains a genie...

... which offers to give her only one wish as he is very much tired from his 10.000 years of imprisonment.

,,I want a million dollars!'' she screams excited.

The Genie nods. ,,It shall be as you wi-''

,,No!'' interrupts the woman. ,,Such a wish is selfish and petty. No, what I w...

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A bear and a rabbit are walking through the forest..

A bear and a rabbit are walking through the forest and they find a genie's magic lamp. Stoked on life, they pick up the lamp and rub it. Out comes the, who bellows "you may have three wishes each."
The bear makes the first wish. "Guys, ive got it. I wish that every bear in this forest was female,...

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A man walking along the beach stumbles upon a bottle...

A man who has been walking along a beach stumbles upon a bottle. He picks up the bottle and takes the cork out of it. The moment he does it, out comes a genie.

The genie looks at the man and said,
>“As you have released me from my imprisonment, I offer you one wish!”

The man th...

A man in prison

A man, who is sentenced to life imprisonment, decides to dig a tunnel to escape. He works for many months on this tunnel, and finally finishes it. He decides to break out during the day, figuring the guards will not suspect this. As he breaks through the ground to the surface, he finds himself in a ...

A man walks into a bar...

After a few beers he is in the middle of a conversation with the bartender, they start talking about penguins and the man brings up:
"I have never seen a penguin"
The bartender replies "what?! You have never seen a penguin?! Get out of my bar and never come back".
The bartender calls for se...

Wishes

A woman was walking on the beach when she spotted a lamp almost buried in the sand. She picked it up, dusted it off, and to her surprise a genie popped out.

"Thank you for releasing me from my thousand-year imprisonment! I will grant you the traditional three wishes as a reward. And since you...

Bill and the Genie

Bill Clinton was driving past the White House when he accidentally ran over the Obama's new puppy, Sunny, crushing it flat as a fritter. He climbed out of his Rolls and sat down on the grass totally distraught. He knew Michele would go absolutely ballistic.

Then he noticed a lamp half-buried...

Lawyer Joke....

A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense: "My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish the whole individual for an offence committed by his limb."

"Well put,...

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